Friday, February 25, 2011

Nostalgia-Life in Bangalore and my village in Tumkur



Travelling brings about a new awareness of one’s own city and the ability to see it with a fresh perspective.
Born and brought up in Bangalore, I have spent most or all of my life here until I moved to Canada in 2004. I had not thought of Bangalore with any degree of depth except to grumble about the increase in crowds, the traffic and it’s ever expanding sprawl.
After returning to Bangalore in 2006, I saw Bangalore differently and became aware of things which I had felt only subliminally in the past. I compared and contrasted it with other cities, with smaller towns, with Toronto and New York and also compared the Bangalore of today to the Bangalore of many years ago.
Contrasting Bangalore today(2006) with the Bangalore of my childhood,(1970s) I find a million changes. I have tried to compile things which were in Bangalore during my childhood and teens (Late 60s through 70s and early 80s) but are now absent or rarely seen. I am trying to note down all that I can remember. I am also not discussing this material with anyone else as everyone will want to shove their ideas here and I want this to be a bag of my memories only! So some stuff you know of , may be missing......but remember it was not part of my experience or..... I can’t recall it while penning this account. Also do remember that I grew up in Malleshwaram and West of Chord road, Rajajinagar and so there may be more material from these areas than other areas. Bangalore has changed in several thousand ways but this lengthy essay covers only that which I noticed.
Let me also acknowledge the fact that I was inspired to write this by the wonderful writings of Dr.M.N.Srinivas, especially his book  "The remembered village". This work is now a classic and is about the village Rampura, written from a sociological and anthropological perspective.
What is written below is a stream of memories as it flowed through my mind and so these are not in any particular order…definitely not in a neat chronological order ! However I am sure that readers from Bangalore can recognize what is described in this monologue and can recall when these people existed or things happened. The changes sweeping Bangalore are huge…economically, socially, politically, demographically, and so on. So many professions have appeared and disappeared, so many events have changed or disappeared over time and it is difficult to identify the exact time of these changes. While change is an inevitable law of nature, I do feel a deep sadness about the loss of some professions, some changes in the life styles of the citizens, and I bitterly rue the vanishing of some customs, attitudes and skill-sets.
Life on the streets of Bangalore in the 70s:
I remember a middle aged man who carried a doll at the top of a long stick with a pink candy round the stick; he would shape this pink candy into a wrist watch, for a price of course and tie it to a kid’s hands and the child would eat this candy. I don’t remember he calling out anything but his doll-stick had a bell and it would jingle as he walked. ( This seems to be going on in 2014 too. My friend's daughter has a photo of this guy selling the same stuff in the Gandhibazar area of Bangalore!)


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On rare occasions, I had seen a guy, who was almost naked, covered with blood which he drew from his body by whipping himself with a horrifying sound with a wicked looking whip. He was accompanied by his wife, (I think she is his wife) a skinny, malnourished woman who collected money from passersby. He was probably a devotee of some God and did this both as part of his worship and livelihood too. The lady with him was in a ragged sari and would collect both money and food grains like rice from the people.
Others who sold goods walking door to door on the streets included a person selling puffed rice which he carried in a sack on his head. That reminds me of another change… In my childhood I remember that gunny sacks were used store all bulk materials i.e. both food grains and cement. Later these were gradually replaced by the plastic bags.

When we moved to Rajajinagar (west of chord road) in the early 70s, it was still a huge area of green land with hardly any houses. The only houses were those of village-houses/huts which existed before the government made the agricultural land into sites or work-in-progress, new houses.
 I remember that a middle aged woman selling buttermilk, which she carried in a mud pot on her head, roamed the new, yet untarred streets. The workers at the construction sites bought the butter milk from her to quench their thirst.
I also recall,, an old lady (or any male or female who appeared to be of rural, lower economic background, selling outside various schools) selling guavas, those red berries called Eleche hannu, goose berries, roasted groundnuts outside schools for 5 paisa, 10 paisa, etc….which reminds me of one more set of things you don’t see these days i.e. small coins and old currency…small coins such ….. One paisa coin, two paisa, three paisa, five and ten and the yellow twenty paisa coin. I had also received from shops the one and two Anna coins and a few silver quarters with the King of England’s profile on some. These Anna coins were probably given by mistake and I have saved them in my collection. I would sit and pour out my old coin collection and look at the coins when I was a child. I loved the wonderful feelings I experienced looking at those coins, especially looking at the ones  supposedly  made of silver! The old one, two and five rupee notes are also absent now. Just to let you know my dear reader, I simply dislike the new coins minted by the Indian government. They are so dull, the engraving is so poor that the engraving appears faded after use and the colour/metal used is so depressing to look at. My grandmother used to tell us of the silver one rupee coins she had used in her childhood and I loved hearing her stories and loved feeling and looking at the one single silver rupee she had saved for us! But I digress!

Pushcart vendors selling ice candy, ice-cream sticks on the roads….calling out loudly ‘ice cream’ were another set of people, who roamed the streets on hot summer afternoons and we would run out on the streets with small change to buy it, if we could convince our parents to part with the money. I remember five other sets of people who moved from door-to-door offering goods and services. One was a guy who sharpened knives, going from door to door and he would do his job with a solid grinding stone attached to a cycle wheel. He would set this apparatus down and pedal the wheel, holding the knife to the wheel, letting sparks fly. After completing his job, there would be a long bargain, with the house-wife or which ever customer telling he is asking too much and he is protesting that he is not! I remember that while people did not bargain much with stuff like ice-creams, they always bargained when it came to services and vegetables. The second was the person who pushed a rectangular cart and set it at street corners and ironed clothes for people. The iron box, was huge, heavy, made of iron (not one of the light-weight Teflon bottomed ones you see today!) and heated with coal. I loved the odor of the clothes, when they were ironed and the glowing red embers in the iron-box! The third was the guy (usually from north India or Tamil Nadu) who exchanged or sold steel vessels. He would go door to door, giving new steel vessels in exchange for old clothes, preferably silk saris. I do not know if they burnt the saris and extracted gold and silver from the brocade embroidery or sold the clothes but what they did with the old clothes always intrigued me! I also recall the jokes men made about their wives giving away their pants and shirts for the shiny new vessels. The fourth set of guys we do not see today were the Tiffin-carrier guys. My dad worked at the agriculture university in Hebbal. He would leave for work, early morning after breakfast. The lunch, consisting of rice and sambar would not be ready by the time he left for work. And so there was this guy, who went to different houses, collecting Tiffin-boxes (steel, three tier, put in a long, cylindrical bag) by bicycle and cycling all the way to Hebbal and delivering the lunch-boxes. Now, I don’t think, anyone would believe that there were people, collecting lunch-boxes from homes, cycling all the way to Hebbal (Hebbal seemed to be far away, on the outskirts of the city in those days). I think, he also collected the empty lunch-boxes and got them back to the homes, if I remember right. Were the men too proud to carry their lunch-boxes home? I don’t know. The fifth set of people who did business walking door to door where the men who bought old newspapers, milk sachets from people. When I came to the west and saw that people simply threw their used newspapers, I recalled the umpteen ways newspapers were used in India! After reading, some would cut out interesting articles and save them (for future use or future generations but this has not happened …One cant find it when one wants it and the future generations are not interested in reading what interested you!). Many would stack them neatly in some corner of the house to sell it to these men who came buying old newspapers in bulk for recycling. Dirt from rooms, was swept on to old newspapers and then thrown. Rice, wheat, etc were spread on newspapers to clean them of tiny pebbles before being cooked. Old newspapers lined shelves. They were used by shop-keepers for packing rice, and a million other purchases. I remember also how precious these newspapers were in my village as no one bought them. My dad would take stacks of old newspapers to give to farmers rearing silk worms for their use. (the worms in various stages were spread on these old newspapers as also the mulberry leaves). I am a voracious reader and there was such as shortage of reading material when I visited my village, that I would read these old newspapers! I never ever read Kannada by choice but due to absence of anything to read in English, I would read the old newspapers brought by my father to the village. Hell! I would even read the patch of a newspaper, wrapped on a book, when I was in the village! The most sad-funny-touching use of newspapers I have seen are the cuttings of Gods and Goddesses by my grandmother to keep in her prayer books and pooja room and the cuttings of film actors and actresses by young village boys and girls who had no other access to them in print. If one observes, the poorer sections of Indian society, one can see the multiple uses of not just newspapers but any item, which is considered worthless in the west.
The other people on the streets we do not see today were the guys who came with animals like a dancing bear, monkeys, snakes, a group of people(called Dombaru) who performed acrobatics on the streets   to collect money. I remember a Telugu movie where these folks i.e. Dombaru were part of the story.

Men selling roasted peanuts, salted cucumber slices, etc are still seen at parks I think, but I have not been to Bangalore parks for so long, I do not know for sure. There were men in dhoties selling guavas, carried on their head in a large tray-like basket. The guavas were either red or white fleshed, costed about 10-25 paise each and he would cut the fruit selected by the customer (who were generally young kids), put in the salt and chilli powder and hand it over. I also recall sacks of coal on cycles and fire-wood on carts being delivered at homes. And of course the kerosene in large drums with a tap, wheeled around on carts in the city, sold at your door-step.


I would love to have photos of these vendors at work! If anyone reading this blog have such photos, I would be grateful to have copies of those photos. I have not seen these people captured for posterity in movies or ads or any old photos. I do know however that R.K.Narayan has written a short story about the knife-sharpener(Can a person who sharpens knives, be called a knife-sharpener? I don’t know. You tell me!) and cute illustrations by his brother R.K.Laxman accompanied the short story in Illustrated weekly of India ages ago. R.K.Narayan and maybe other writers too have mentioned these people in their stories. These vendors and common folks of India of the 60s, 70s and 80s may be portrayed in old movies but I simply can’t recall any such movie (Bhagyavantaru has a scene of a lady selling vegetables, Aarthi sells some stuff door to door in Shubhamangala, but that is all I can recall).
I know that as recently as 2010, people do sell vegetables carried on their heads in baskets or pushed on cycles or carts in some parts of Bangalore. But not in all streets like before.
Now in 2011, walking on the streets of Bangalore is a nightmare, let alone, balancing a basket of vegetables on your head to sell it to buyers ! The noise level, the motor cyclists driving on the pavements, the vendors competing for space with the pedestrians are impossible to cope with.

Some other memories of the things absent today include puzzles on cheap flimsy paper which came with newspapers… we were expected to solve the puzzle and mail it to addresses in Bombay or Delhi to win a transistor or other stuff ! I realized how awful the prizes were after winning a prize (a transistor which leaked the battery cells and dint work) and sending money for shipping.


Another memory is of the daily lottery draws for bus tickets and people holding on to their tickets to hopefully win a prize. I think this scheme was started to encourage people to buy tickets and prevent ticketless travel.
One favourite memory of mine is buying antique, carved or engraved copper and brass vessels outside the K.R.Market fort in the 80s. There are make-shift shops clinging to the fort-wall near Victoria hospital and the Government Dental College and hospital, where a couple of shops sold this antique brass ware. The remaining shops sold the cheap plastic stuff such as table cloths, slippers, aluminum vessels, etc.
A friend’s brother who lives in Kilari road, just off Avenue road, visits the Sunday market on the streets of Market and comes home with antique stuff which catches his eye. I just love some of his collection, which he has got for peanuts! Most are idols of more than 100 years old…most are not in great shape, but the thrill and excitement of hunting for antiques in those crowded and dirty streets is simply mind-blowing!
For people interested in old electrical appliances, the streets on Sundays, near K.R.Market, such as Avenue road are gold mines.
I know a guy in Canada who has collected different typewriters . If he comes to India, he would find so many from the British era in various nooks and crannies of India!

Life at home:
The biggest difference I can think of between now and 25 years ago, about my home/ homes of friends and relatives, is that people had fewer possessions back then. Now people have a lot more materials in their house, cramming space.


The things people had in those days mostly included clothes stored in Godrej almirahs or iron trunks (kept under cots), vessels ( copper ones were polished and kept for display in high shelves) steel, copper and aluminum, some furniture such as iron folding chairs, a tea-poi or small table, iron or wood cots with beds (cotton beds which could be folded in the morning). The houses also had a radio, clock (winding type with alarm), electric fans (usually table top fans than ceiling fans)cycle or scooter depending on their economic status, electric stove or kerosene stove, huge brass ‘handes’ with electric coil to heat the water for bath. If the house had a telephone, you can be sure it was an office phone and this means the person was a ‘high-up’ officer in the government!
No one I know had a car, among my relatives, friends and neighbours except one neighbour and one school class mate (Ambassador cars and fiats). Except 2-3 families, none had phones and those who had, had it because their office installed it at their homes. Many families owned scooters. I do know, a few people who loved music had cassette players. All families owned iron-boxes. We bought several over years as they simply did not last.
I have to mention here that I had a gullible father who always bought electrical, electronic and other items too from Burma Bazaar, in the Majestic area of Bangalore which sold fake ‘foreign’ goods which did not last even a month. My dad unfortunately preferred to believe the crooks selling these fake goods than family members who advised him against buying there! My dad bought umpteen iron boxes, ‘citizen’ watches, etc but never seemed to learn his lesson. He would blame us when things stopped working and say things like, we did not use the iron box ‘properly’, we did not switch it on or off ‘properly’ and so on.
If you are one who believes that professors with PhDs cannot be conned, by these vendors from the streets of the Majestic area, think again. My dad and his collegues at the University, were all gulled at this Burma Bazar.
So what chance do the innocents from villages and small towns stand against these rapacious vendors? Thousands get taken for a ride daily in the streets and gullies of Majestic and lose their hard-earned money. It drives me mad to see farmers (of all the people who get cheated, I feel most sorry for the farmers and villagers) whose money is so painfully earned getting scammed away by these crooks selling rubbish. I should also bring to your attention, the hundreds of villagers and small town guys who come to Bangalore and return to their homes after ‘a night on the town’.... after acquiring HIV & other STDs.
Coming back from my irate rambling, to the subject of life at home……Now the number of things one has in a house is 50 times more than before. But I am not sure if we are 50 times happier than before! Of course, today, we are more comfortable, (example we have the ac in summer)have more stimulating experiences(movies and books and hobbies) and more activities to keep us busy. We are also doing a lot less of the strenuous physical work of the past. The use of the mixer in the kitchen is one huge labour reducer. I remember my grandmother at the grinding stone daily morning making chutney, later she was grinding the masala for the sambar. On holidays my dad would pound the various ingredients to make the chutney pudi and this would take nearly half a day! Pounding the tamarind, red chillis, and some hardy dhals was an especial pain!
My family got a washing machine only recently but the laundry was another time sucking chore. Today’s kids who live in flats are not aware of the granite stone in the backyards of houses where the clothes were pounded daily noon by the wife or the maid servants in most homes. For some reason I enjoyed the ritual of soaking the clothes in soap water (surf), waiting a while and then pounding the clothes on the granite slab in the backyard. Rinsing them and hanging them out to dry on the clothes line followed by watching the Sunday evening movie on tv with coffee and vada was a pleasant end to the chores of the Sunday. But sometimes when it was cold or raining, I hated washing ; the clothes which had soaked for too long in the soap water would stink and get my parents yelling at me to finish the washing! My neighbour, was saying, that these days, with water scarcely flowing through the taps, washing is not much fun anymore. One has to be ready to wash even at an unearthly hour such as 3 am if that is when the water flows!
We still sweep the house with the broom as vacuum cleaning has still not caught up in India. Maybe it will some time soon. Who knows? Meanwhile I hear men, who do no household work, telling the women in their families, that machines are not good and doing these chores is a good form of exercise!
Cooking at home was on kerosene stove, later on an electric coil stove and then gas. I have eaten food cooked by all three in my life-time. Also when I visited my village, all village house-holds cooked on firewood burning ovens; my grandmother cooked on a stove made by aligning 3-6 bricks and piling wood in between.
In some Brahmin houses, cooking was on ‘agastige’ i.e. coal burning stoves, wood burning stoves as late as 1992 in one household I know. I remember that we had wood-burning in the ‘va-le’ in the bathroom for heating bath-water in the 70s. I also remember the cow-patty burning ovens(do we call it an oven? I don’t know) of families in rural areas and those in Bangalore who owned cows.
Talking of cow-dung, does anyone today see, buckets of water mixed with cow dung and spread in front of the houses on muddy ground, to harden the ground and make it less dusty? Well I know of many families in Bangalore who bought cow dung from those who owned cows; spreading the cow dung and water mixture and making a hard green patch on the muddy ground at the entrance of their homes and putting rangoli on it. I bet none of the city kids of today know the multiple uses of cow dung in the last(and even now) decade.

I remember all houses including ours had a radio and we would listen to film songs on the radio and also the radio dramas and films sound tracks on Sundays. Now I don’t see radios in most houses or the transistors. Later i.e. in the 80s, I saw black and white television sets in homes and now they too have disappeared! Now we see colour television sets in most houses. Computer and internet is another life-style altering change which was absent in my younger days. Today, I can’t imagine how life would be without the television, computer and internet!
Let me add here about the typing of my MA thesis in 1986 on a typewriter. First I had to find someone who would type it for me quickly, and this person should also charge reasonably and type accurately without mistakes. One mistake meant that the entire page had to go and everything typed anew! (my professor would not accept white-inked corrections!). I spent a lot of time finding a typist who was right for me!
The next thesis (M.Phil) I had to type was done by a typist with an electronic typewriter in 1990. This was slightly better (you can see the mistakes and correct them before they were in ink). The last, i.e. my PhD was typed on a computer in 1999. It was fantastic to do it on a computer but it also meant that my supervisor would ruthlessly and frequently make changes and I had to keep taking printouts of the same matter over and over again! Now life is so easy after the coming of computers for millions of people such as secretaries, clerks, accountants and anyone who has to deal with written matter. The generation born and brought up in the computer age would not be able to manage a day without the computer.
My cousins kids aged 7 & 8 from Canada who saw a typewriter in the attic of my house were fascinated by it and felt that it was ‘cool’ and enjoyed typing away! I am sure they would have been fascinated by the dial up phone too in my house had they seen it.

The compulsory government documentary before the movie started in the movie theatre & the advertisements and the national anthem at end of the movie with the picture of the Indian national flag are other things of the past. But I am not completely sure if these have disappeared or are still present as I have not seen a movie in an Indian theatre for at least past 15 years.

School Life:
Life in school is quite different today from the life I had in school. Most of us studied in the schools with state syllabus but today most schools seem to have the central syllabus. The texts I see today are really scary to me! They seem to be so complex and difficult and definitely too much for the age group them are meant for! I don’t know if kids today are born with a greater IQ than we were born. I am sure I could never have coped with today’s syllabus, if I was born about 20 years later than I was born! I would probably flunk in 4th grade and drop out of school and become a delinquent! (stealing money from my parents, watching movies and maybe playing videogames!) But some things which do not seem to have changed include the autocratic behaviour of teachers, the uninspiring style of teaching and the absence of playtime and play grounds. I am glad that teachers are less punitive than in my days. The painful punishments I was receiving included being hit on the knuckles with the edge of the wooden scale and the most humiliating was being asked to partially undress( i.e. take the buttons of your skirt/shorts) in front of the whole class of boys and girls. But I do believe that kids in government schools and schools with low fees (and attended by the poorer sections of society where the kids are brutalized by under-paid teachers and remain unprotected by their parents who remain silent… the parents are afraid that their child is will be kicked out of school if they protest)
Materially there are some changes since my time. When I was a school kid, some school kids had an aluminum box to carry school books while most had bags. I so badly wanted one of those silvery looking boxes but my dad got me the school bag, a khaki one worn on the back with straps. By the end of the year it was in tatters, evidence of the huge weight of the books I carried daily to school!
Multi tier Tiffin boxes of steel and aluminum to school were the rule in my school time. Now these have been replaced by multi-coloured plastic Tiffin boxes with cartoon figures on them. Lekak note books were popular in the 70s and maybe 80s as also note books with photos of gods and nature. We loved notebooks with photos of film stars on the front cover but these were frowned upon by our teachers. Today there’s an amazing range of note books available. The artsy note books made of hand-made paper, scented paper, leather bound books, engraved and embossed books available today are mind-boggling!


Life at home: Food & Clothes and other things
Today I am sure a lot of middle class people buy their rice, wheat and sugar from private grocery stores but during the 70s, 80s and maybe even earlier, most middle class and lower middle classes would buy only from the government run ration depot. Each family had a ration card with the names of the family members on it and would get sugar, rice, wheat, semolina and the precious kerosene at the government ration depot than in the other shops where they cost (or at least according to my dad) more. I am so glad and thankful the days of the ration shop is over for me at least. I hated the repeated visits to the shop to ask if the kerosene or sugar had arrived and be told that it has not or it arrived and it was finished, to stand in long queues for obtaining these products. The rice was simply awful, the worker who sold you the stuff seemed to cheat at measurement & weights, the fights which broke out in the queues were appalling and embarrassing to me, a sensitive teenager at that time. My dad refused to buy sugar(or rice or anything available at the ration shop) from other stores. Often the rice from the ration shop was unpalatable and he finally stopped getting rice from this ration shop when the women in the house absolutely refused to cook the ration shop rice! These are some of the bitter memories of my childhood life.
As many sufferers from Bangalore would recognize, the ration card played many other roles than simply providing kerosene, rice and sugar! It was also an identity card for a family! We had to produce the ration card and our name on it, to prove our existence to some government organizations to get any work done from that organization. It was hell for me after I got married as my name was not on the ration card of my husband’s family and I stayed too far from my parents family! Also I know of a family, where the eldest son and family ‘inherited’ the ration card (the government stopped issuing ration cards at some time) and could get low cost products and the younger sons and their families were bitter! I have a lot more ration card stories but I guess this is enough to give a flavour of the role played by the ration card in the life of thousands of Bangaloreans! My nieces today do not know what a ration card is or maybe they do not even know what kerosene is!

Milk is another topic on which I can write a book ! Families in Bangalore depended on Bangalore dairy milk, a small number of families depended on Nilgiris dairy milk even smaller number bought cows & buffalo milk. I have seen milk from cows and buffaloes delivered even today to houses in some parts of Bangalore. These cattle are looked after by some people who either milk the cattle at home and deliver the milk in those grey tin cans or walk the cows to the house and milk the cow right outside the house and deliver! Fresh off the udder, so to speak! The reason they are forced to walk the cow from house to house is ‘trust issues’ with the buyers; the buyers suspect that the milkman will adulterate the milk with water and insist that the cow be milked in front of their eyes! (Will the milk be watery if the milk-man gives the cow buckets of water to drink, just before milking? I don’t know!) I also know that on certain occasions like festivals and poojas, people insist on cow’s milk and certain orthodox Brahmins use cows milk daily. Bangalore, the silicon valley of India, retaining cattle in spite of its modernity is a blessing for these people! I also recently discovered a new use for these cows. There are other uses for cows in the modern city of Bangalore, even today. I have a friend who buys cows urine and drinks it for health purpose! I know of many software professionals who needed a cow to walk through their new house on the day of the housewarming ceremony(Gruhapravesha) to bless their house. I know of lots of Brahmin intellectuals (scientists, engineers, doctors) who use cow dung as part of the Pooja on some days. Before you guys start accusing me, let me add that it is not just Brahmins but lots of Hindus, it is not just intellectuals or these professionals but most Hindus use cow dung in Poojas. I find it ironical that "modern Bangalore" continues to have need for cows and cow dung; imagine a Brahmin engineer for whom both the computer and cow dung are almost equally important and he cannot do without either of them! The cow dung, cow urine for his spiritual needs and the computer for his professional needs. Once again, I have digressed. Pardon me!
Milk came in bottles from the Bangalore dairy during the 70s and maybe 80s too. I do not remember when they stopped the bottles and started the sachets. Thick curds in a white plastic tin with a blue lid were delivered but I think they no longer deliver curds or they deliver it in sachets. I do know that the Nandini peda continues to be supplied but the cost has more than quadrupled! The earliest cost of milk I remember was 80 paise for half litre bottle. I am not sure what it costs now but I know it is more than 10 times 1.60 per litre.
Clothes:
I remember that many families would buy cloth material and get the cloth stitched by tailors before festivals like Deepavali and Ugadi. Now my little nephews and nieces buy their clothes ready made. I remember buying material in Binny mill stores at Mekri circle and National Textiles and other stores in Majestic. Now the Binny mills store no longer exists. I think (but am not sure but) a watch company i.e. Titan bought or took over the Binny Mills space in Mekri circle. I also remember my dad buying a length of the same material for me and all my sisters! Now I do not think any two sisters will let their parents buy the same material for them! There is so much to say about clothing and what changes have happened now. I and many middle class girls wore langas and blouses while now only very little girls(below 6 years maybe) wear silk langas for festive occasions while most wear western clothes such as frocks, jeans, and north Indian styles such as salwar-kameezs and lehengas. Listen, I may be wrong here. Maybe there are many families where the kids wear langas but I do not see them in my circle. Also I have not visited or seen life in smaller towns and other cities than Bangalore and do not know what is happening there. Even when I was a child, I hardly saw any girls wearing the langa daavanis though many heroines in movies wore them! ( I think the langa daavani is an indication of a girl not yet married while the sari implied that she is married or older or some such meaning).
In the 70s, Flared pants and printed shirts were worn by women and flared pants and printed shirts were worn by men. Looking back now, I still sort of like the women’s clothes but the men’s printed shirts seem to be awful! Now, you see only plain, checks or striped shirts on men….even in rural areas, which are relatively slow to change with the trends. I remember my husband being gifted with awful printed shirt pieces (i.e. it is a length of shirt material to be stitched into a shirt) on our wedding day by relatives! I was furious at the cloth materials but realize that it was simply being regifted by people who had themselves received the awful pieces from someone else! I wanted to throw them but my dad, who is frugal to the point of being miserly, took them, got them stitched and wore them for years and years!
What else do I remember about dressing and clothes? Oh. I loved the textile advertisements both on paper and on movie screens. They were lovely. I still remember the ads of Bombay dyeing, Vimal, Chellarams, Binnys, Priyadarshni silks and others( I cant remember the names of the other companies).
Today men buy readymade under garments.  Until a few years ago, my dad was buying white cotton material called ‘long cloth’ and getting his underwear i.e. vests and boxer-type shorts stitched by a tailor. He  further economised by buying what was called ‘kora batte’ i.e. a beige-coloured cloth woven with probably unrefined cotton as it was cheaper than  the 'white' long cloth. 
I am sure that today, none of  the men  in my village wear the ‘langoti’ i.e. loin cloth i.e. a cloth tied round the waist in lieu of underwear. But I remember seeing old men in Langoties in the 70s, when I was a kid. My memory of village men was of men clad in white dhotis, &white shirts or some would wear khaki half pants with white shirts and a towel round their heads if it was hot or if they were carrying heavy loads on their heads; if not, the towel, would be on one shoulder. Now the scene has changed completely and one sees the dhoti very rarely and sees more of pants and shirts.
Women wore cotton saris and later changed to the synthetic saris which were cheap and easier to wash. Girls were in langas and blouses or shirts in the 70s and 80s. And anyone (for example me) who wore salwars and kameezs were stared at by every villager  and questioned why I dressed like a ‘muslim’. Now, in 2010, when I visited my village, I saw girls in pants and long shirts…but remember these were pre-pubescent girls. (the pants and shirts are still accompanied by the mandatory flowers in hair, one or two plaits, long earrings and kumkum, which simply do not look good  with pants and shirts in my opinion!) The post-pubescent are not yet wearing pants but do wear salwars and kameezs and churidars, without their elders
getting upset!
Dressing and grooming today is very different from that of my childhood. Women of my parent’s generation rarely ever went to beauty parlours or used make up. My generation does. My generation women in villages are like their mothers but the current generation of young women from villages use make up (Make up is limited to lipstick, nail polish and getting eye brows tweezed. That’s it. But even this minimal attention to looks can earn severe reprimands from parents and elders in the village and aspersions about the girls’ character cast by the busy bodies of the village!) Use of lipstick was so strongly associated with loose character, loose morals and sex that many women who grew in that culture, refuse to use make up even today. Another change I have seen but maybe it is my imagination and not true….is that earlier north Indian women seemed to use make up but now lots of people in the south do; earlier only upper class women and city women used make up but now use of make up is prevalent in rural and small town and in all classes of women. I remember an aunt of mine sarcastically telling that her maid servant demands extra money for working extra on festival days and spending the money in the beauty parlour. Whether my aunt was angry that her ‘servant’ is ‘dressing up’ or angry that she is asking for extra cash, I don’t know. But it is really nice to see the differences between the lower and upper classes decreasing today in various ways. The disparity in dressing has definitely reduced. Now the differences are at a more subtle and sophisticated level.
One last thing I have to mention here is the use of hair dye in both rural and urban India. My dad and all his friends had their and continue to have their original hair color to this day. Some of the women from my mother’s generation, at least the ones in the cities, dye their hair black. Of my generation, some women refused to dye or meddle with their hair, some like me started dying their hair while others who believe that the chemicals are harmful, use henna to cover their greying hair and turn their hair into an awful orange color which is worse than if it had been left grey! I would have been amused by this orange but as one of the orange haired ladies is my own sister, I am furious and not amused! In my village, I had heard that the only time people bought hair dye was to dye their aging buffaloes just before they were taken to be sold at the village fair. Imagine my surprise when I visited my village in 2010 after many years and found that lots of village folks are now dyeing their hair! Both men and women! I was surprised especially by the fact that men have also started. Many appear embarrassed and sheepish about it but have the strength of mind to go ahead and dye!
Villages:
Continuing this talk about villages and the changes in my village over time, I would like to mention a few changes I have witnessed. Of course, there is television too in my village now. Initially black and white and now color. However, due to frequent power cuts, the people miss many programs. There is greater anger about the powercuts affecting the television than affecting the vital water supply to the fields! I recall my uncle bemoaning how badly the television has affected the work ethic of the younger generation in his family and the labourers in his fields. When one person (the richest in the village) bought the first television, the entire village (except those who were not on talking terms with the family) were at their door, crowding into their overflowing house to see the boring government programs. Later as more households got televisions, the crowds reduced a bit! Now all work in the village (and city too) centered around the television! The cleaning of food grains, cutting mulberry leaves for fodder for the silk worms, shelling peanuts and a myriad other tasks were all done in front of the television in a hot crowded, mosquito infested room!
Some other changes in my village which appear great theoretically but very distressing in actual fact have occurred. The appearance of the English medium schools is one such. I know that the only way to escape poverty is education and that English education gives greater access to knowledge than Kannada but the quality of these schools is poor. One really can’t blame anyone but the circumstances. I do not mind the poor quality of the school, the teaching, etc. What I simply hate is the fear and low self esteem the teachers in these schools inculcate in the poor students with their cruel methods of teaching. I have seen tiny tots being beaten by day care staff in villages and small towns and taluks, which is very very distressing to me. The day cares and schools blindly copy their urban counter-parts. But they imitate in part and not in whole…and the material and methods is so out-of-context in the rural setting. Also the fact that none of their family speak or know English, makes this first generation of English medium students suffer immensely.
Moving away from this distressing topic, there are other changes in my village. The kids looking for jobs in the city, women putting on makeup, opening of nursing and B.ed (Bachelor of education)colleges, influx of other state's people.
I had seen bicycles in my village during my childhood but only boys &men rode them. Today I see girls too riding cycles. I had seen one exceptional girl who rode a men’s bicycle, with her langa, without problem( without any exposure or discomfort I mean) in the 80s! There are a lot of petrol guzzling two wheelers like mopeds, motorbikes and scooters in my taluk now and a few in the village.
The caste system continues but not exactly like in the past. I do know if unfortunate young people secretly killed by their relatives and silently buried (no police involvement at all!) for falling in love with youth from a lower or different caste in villages of my taluk. I do know that due to education and the mass media, some positive changes have occurred in my village such as a decrease in the number of kids each couple has. However, the access to education has also caused people to put their knowledge to wrong uses such as female foeticide. Other sad changes in my village is the failure of farms (due to ‘no rains’ or ‘untimely rains’) and migration of youth to the cities and those who did well survived in the city but many are leading difficult lives. My dad also migrated to the city for education and later stayed on in the city. So did all of my uncles and many other relatives and family friends I know. However, I think that it was easier in the 40s, 50s and 60s to migrate to the city and do well than now. The older generation seemed to have had excellent schooling in the villages, not inferior to the city’s school education. Also lack of English knowledge did not seem to deter them from succeeding.
But the gap between cities and villages seems to be huge now especially with regard to the quality of education and access to educational aids such as the internet, libraries, labs, museums, etc. The rural youth are getting left increasingly behind their city counter parts. The youth who migrate today do not have the skills to get good paying jobs in the city and there are limited job opportunities in rural areas and the traditional agriculture fails for various reasons.
Unless the government makes efforts to deal with rural issues, the problems in rural India will escalate. Other changes I have heard of and noticed in my village and the neighbouring villages is in the various habits.
I belong to a caste(Gowdas i.e.Kunchitigas) which did not eat meat or eggs. Now many villagers of my caste eat meat and eggs (including me). There was only one old man who abused alcohol in about 2 villages I know of and now many use alcohol. The appearance of the village too has changed. There were a handful of houses during my childhood and now there are more houses as the population has increased. The houses built today too are vastly different from those of the older ages. The old houses had one tiny window and were dark even during the day. There were one or two bedrooms, with sturdy doors, which housed the safe and clothes and maybe gunny bags of food grains. The front of the house was usually divided into 4 areas i.e. it had the bathroom, a place for tying the cattle, a kitchen cooking and a living space. This was the most lived in area of the house and rich in heat and smells! Odors of cowdung & cow's urine mixed with smoke from the kitchen fire almost wiped out the delicate smells of whatever one was working on in the living space…shelling peanuts, cleaning rice, peeling avarekai, cutting mulberry leaves or whatever. The mosquitoes in these houses were appalling as they were not small like the city mosquitoes but huge and had a really painful sting( People called them ‘dhanada solle’ i.e. cattle mosquitoes). Most village folks I know seem impervious to mosquito bites while I found it impossible to sleep and spent the entire night, slapping them away.
Now I know many who have mosquito nets at home. There are many changes happening in my village but these changes are uneven and not always for the better. I had hoped for tap water in the village and though it is now available, it is still not enough. Toilets too continue to be absent and people defecate in the fields even today. Which is sad for so many reasons…the absence of privacy( when you walk with a tin of water towards the pit, whoever passes you know what your destination is ), the embarrassment when you have diarrhoea and running to the fields, young girls who have to look around to check if any males are nearby before they sit down to pee, the hygiene issues and so on. And God forbid, you accidentally spill the one precious tin of water before you wash your self!

One change my village went through was the crops they grew. Initially they grew ragi and paddy and when silk production made them rich, many switched partially or fully to growing mulberry instead of rice and ragi in the 80s.  Then they started buying rice at the government run ration depots…it was ironical for me to see farmers buying poor quality rice from shops instead of growing it. Later many farmers failed at silk production due to a combination of poor skills(using too much fertilizer, not keeping the delicate worms safe from insects, heat, etc) and bad luck such as failed or unseasonal rains. Some sociologically interesting events took place in the form of changes brought about by the sudden increase in riches which lead to change in relationships between the people who were once equal. Some families became bitter enemies suspecting others of sabotaging their silk production by spraying weedicides on their mulberry plants. Currently there is little or no production of silk worms in my village. As I told before, one can write an entire book about silk production and how it changed the lives of my village people. Or maybe make a movie! There is enough drama even if one sticks to only events which have happened!
Several changes which occurred in rural India before I was even born should be discussed to make people aware of our past. I have been told by my grandmother of changes which happened when she was young and I have noted a few things she had told me.
The entry of electricity especially the pumpsets for wells in villages made a huge difference. Earlier, only small bits of land were farmed as they had to be watered by bullocks which drew water from the wells. But with the arrival of pumpsets, there was a huge increase in the amount of land a farmer could successfully farm and acres of forest land were cut away for farmland.
The arrival of buses made transport easier to some extent and people started marrying people who were of their caste & sub-caste but in far off villages! Previously, the parents of brides would look for eligible grooms in their own village or at the most, nearby villages. They did not want their beloved daughter to be given away to a groom who lived 10 miles away!

My grandmother also told me that the visit to Tirupati was a once in a lifetime experience for many villagers. They would pack food for a month, travel by ox cart and take about a month or less to get there and back! (Tirupati is about 160 miles away from her village). Hardly any villager in her youth, had travelled beyond a distance of 50 miles from her village. If at all they travelled, it would be to buy something not available in the village or to attend a court case. My grandmother proudly boasted to me that she was the only one in her village to have travelled to Mysore!

The arrival of the flourmill (i.e. a flour-mill which runs on electricity) drastically decreased a major chore of women in the village. My grandmother often spoke of the hours she spent grinding ragi flour between two granite stones. She also told tales of her step mother's cruelty and many of her tales involved the long hours of manually grinding the food grains!
The flourmill itself made a huge difference in the life of the man who owned the flourmill, but that is another story.
My grandmother also told me of the changes she saw in her life-time....of boys in the village cutting off their long hair tied in juttus, changing from dhotis to shorts and pants, boys going to the taluk for higher (i.e high school) education after long struggles with their fathers who did not want them to go to the taluk to study but wanted them to work on the fields instead. One thing she mentioned which makes me feel ashamed was that some boys wanted to join the fight against the British but their parents did not allow them to participate. The parents were concerned about their kids getting into trouble and wanted them to stay safely in the village. I wonder what is the percentage of villagers who felt this way and if we would be still under some British rule, if all parents were wanting to keep their kids away from joining the movement against the British.
The spread of HIV and other STDs in my village is a phenomenon as recent as 20 years. I know there are no available information about the older and present generation's sexual life but there has been some changes in the sexual life of the men folks in the villages. As people are not open about this issue,
What I am writing now is pure guess work and based on what people have gossiped to me! My understanding is that men in the past, had affairs discreetly with women in their or neighbouring villages. There was of course an element of power in this. I know of rich men who had affairs with poor women ( by poor I mean women who were financially weak; widows; wives deserted by their husbands, etc) There were men who had a wife and also a mistress and the mistress was taken care of by giving her food, shelter and clothing. Of course, this lead to huge fights especially if the wife was assertive and the fights were more often than not, physical.
Now, a lot of young men, who are single and even some school kids have paid sex workers and gone to cities like Tumkur for their pleasures. This is probably what has lead to the increase in HIV and other STDs in my taluk. Due to the ignorance & false beliefs, (for example,' If I have sex with a housewife I will not get HIV';' If I have sex with a young girl I will not get any disease', etc)secretiveness and hypocrisy, HIV & STDs will only increase in my Taluk . I am now wondering what my Taluk will look like in the near future. Will there will be a reduction of population because of better family planning, migration to cities, loss of life to AIDS? I do not see people moving into my village...I only see them moving out.
Many are disillusioned with farming and many do not want to practice it but find a job preferably a government job with a steady pay. Many girls are going after higher education and are more sincere about education than the boys as that is one of the few means of escape from their current life in the village. Many women are refusing to marry farmers and demand to get married to men in the city or with a steady job. They do not want the hard life of a farmer’s wife, especially in a dry arid region like Madhugiri (no rains).

I remember when I was visiting(in 2000) Bhuj, a dry desert part of Gujrat, a driver complaining to me that women no longer wanted to marry camel drivers but want to marry lorry/truck drivers as they make more money!

 I also recall a young, newly wed lady crying to a therapist, that she had married a farmer and moved from a town(Doddaballapur) to his village and how tough life was and that she wanted to leave him. She, who was used to the luxury of tap water flowing in her kitchen and bathroom, before marriage, now had to manually draw water from a well and carry it home, on her head...many many times a day.The therapist felt sorry for her but after bringing up many ideas, had no do-able solutions to offer.

Coming back to my village......I do know of some farmers who apparently seem to have done well i.e. they own lots of lands, have tractors and hire labourers. But when you talk to these farmers, you realize that owning a tractor and lots of land in no way makes them rich. It just gives them more headaches. The complaints I heard from one of them was again about the fickle monsoons, the lazy workers, the thefts from his coconut trees and areca nut trees, the death of many of his areca and coconut trees after a prolonged drought (in Sira), the frequent and costly repairs of his tractor, the cost of gas to run his tractor, the failing rates of some agricultural products due to over production in some years ( for example, the cost of labour to harvest the tomatoes and cost of transporting them to the city was not covered by the money he would get for the tomatoes. So he let it rot in the fields and also told people to take them from his fields for free).

The breakdown of the joint families in the village is another major change happening since several decades. Slowly one family after another are breaking into nuclear families. Once again, many movies have dealt with this theme. I know, many movies seem over the top, but when you actually witness and experience the complexities of life in a joint family in my village, the movies do not seem over the top at all!
I for one am for the break of the joint families as I find the cons greater than the pros. There are many changes influencing India i.e. democracy, attempts towards gender equality, access to education for all (and not only a few castes), shift from traditional and family professions to other professions, changes in the value systems and society’s caste based hierarchy, etc. The joint family system has values which are getting outdated and cannot fit in with the current values system. Today, women are asserting their rights as equals, women are working outside and not at home as housewives, adult children make their own decisions and do not wait for parent approval especially about choices they make, etc. The men are getting impatient and no longer want to take the advice or obey the word of their 75 year old, probably dementing father or Doddappa about selling or buying property, digging a well or whatever decision. The youth know that they know more than their parents at least with regard to some issues like education and do not want to take the advice from their illiterate parents about what course to opt for in college. So the complete obedience to the elders in the family, the domination of men over women, the old over the young is slowly going out. But not without the people losing power, putting up a fight!
In villages, it is not just the clash of old vs new values which are causing breakup of joint families. There are so many other ugly factors too. The tyranny of the upper castes, the corruption in the Panchyat system, the partiality of fathers towards some of their sons, the unfairness of property division between sons of two wives of one man, the widows who get neither property or respect from both parents families and the in-laws families, the bitter and long lasting court cases between members of the same family, fights between neighbours (not just house-neighbours but more importantly land neighbours), the quarrels between the wives of brothers living together, the quarrels about division of labour, division of the harvest, the list goes on.

One fascinating, ugly, funny and sad thing I should mention here about my village folks, is the variety of fights about the land which land in courts. My family itself has been involved in many court cases which have dragged on for years and hopefully will be cleared up in a year or so. Remember, some of the court cases started when my father was a toddler and now he is 75. My grandmother went to court suing her in laws for not giving her, her husband’s share of property when he died (he died when my dad was only a baby) and later many other cases were filed by her and also her in laws and now many of the parties have died but the cases are still surviving and going on ! The land, I am sorry to say is not worth the time, effort and money spent on fighting for it (less than an acre, sort of dry land and does not yield even 5000 rupees of profit per harvest). Any advice to my dad to give up the case and the land is met with stubborn refusal as he says that it is the ‘principal’ of the thing and that it is his ancestral land even if it is worthless. He knows that none of us, i.e. his daughters, will ever go to the village and manage the lands but he continues to fight for it at his age of 75!

I would love to write a list of the fascinating number and variety of human follies as reflected in these court cases, but the list is huge and as I already said, they reflect the ugly side of human behaviour. But these court cases make me ponder about the psychology of my people. They seem like nice enough folks when I talk to them, I am grateful for their hospitality when I visit, I enjoy their company, but I cannot understand what drives them to these insane fights which cost more than they can afford.

But please do not think the lawyers have made huge profits of them. The fascinating and lovely thing about rural life is that many folks do not pay the lawyer, underpay the lawyer or pay with rice, ragi, milk, firewood, vegetables or labour but definitely not with a lot of money. Often, lawyers are relatives or friends of the people they are fighting for and ask for no payment.

Coming back to changes in Bangalore, there have been changes in the businesses in Bangalore. Lots of new ones have sprung up and many old ones have disappeared. A few I know when have disappeared or in the process of dying out are the typewriting & shorthand classes. I went for typewriting for 3 months and gave up while my sisters lasted a bit longer. There were quite a bit of boys and girls having crushes on each other but never exchanging a word. At the most a glance or a hello but not beyond that! I wonder if these classes are still going on in the smaller towns?

There were shops housed in a tiny wooden structure which sold items like bananas, cigarettes and beedies and matches, beetle leaves and nuts, a few candies and chocolates. Now I do not see these wooden structures (they were called pettige angadi i.e. shop-made-of-wood) mainly as the land in Bangalore is being taken over by buildings. These shops had a wonderful smell which was a combination of the  all the items they sold. There were the Kaka angadis too, probably run by Keralites or coastal people such as Mangaloreans. These were bigger grocery shops. Now with the coming of food world, and other huge stores, many of these shops are getting wiped out as also the Shetty run grocery shops. I know a person who expresses satisfaction at the ruin of these Shetty businesses as he felt they were rude and obnoxious to the customers and also illtreated the workers in their shops. I however feel sorry as this is a change which is removing the old flavours and charms of Bangalore. These shops continue to run in places like Gandhi Baazar, parts of old Majestic and K.R.Market areas.

But some things will not change with time. One is religion and religious practices, Another is food. The temples, Mosques and Churches seem to be doing the same roaring business, in fact more due to the increase in population. There is a guy at Good shed road for example, who is supposed to be a Tantrik who has powers to help you by removing black magic, etc. Even in this day and age, with so much of scientific knowledge, you continue to see people in a long serpentine queue outside his place!

The old ways of preparing food (in hotels, road-side eateries) and eating continue with some minor changes. The dosas of Vidyarthi Bhavan, meals at MTR, etc continue to taste the same. I know that at Vidyarthi Bhavan, chutney continues to be ground by a person and not a giant mixer or wet grinder! But changes in cost of food, changes in the cutlery (plastic instead of steel), disposable instead of washable cutlery and crockery is occurring. Men who were selling banana leaves for many decades continue to sell them at Chamrajpet for weddings and other functions. So also do the flower sellers for weddings, Poojas, etc.

For some reason I remembered the Cinema when I was writing about flower sellers and floral decorators. I remember now! It is because, the movie hoardings had large flower garlands hanging on them!

I studied in  Maharani's college in Bangalore in the 80s and walked from the Majestic bus-stand to the college through Gandhinagar. I would see  men or boys making huge hoardings of the film stars to be put up outside theatres when movies were released. These men would spread huge canvas on the pavements of Gandhinagar and looking at a photo, would beautifully paint huge (more than 10-20 feet in size) images of the stars. Judging by their clothes, they were paid a pittance but their work was a wonderful, glorious,colourful, eye catching sort of pop-art! Rainbow hues captured the emotions and features of these film stars. Huge posters of Rajkumar, Vishnuvardhan, Ambareesh and a host of other actors and actresses were created by these men. I think these guys and their jobs disappeared with the onset of the new printing technology. Apparently, the world famous modern artist, M.F.Hussein started as one  such poster painter!

Modern times have killed many such professions, though I do agree that many professions which never existed before have come in today. But I do feel bad about the ones who disappeared. A way of life, art forms, a set of beliefs, a life-style has disappeared with these changes.

One good thing about Bangalore/India is that many professions which have disappeared completely in the west, continue to exist even today(in 2011). The sad part is that, these professionals are paid a pittance for their work as their service is not given proper values and recognition.

Why do we pay without bargaining, whatever it costs to buy an Ipod but haggle and bargain with the poor people who are in the service industry? When I hear housewives complaining about paying so much money to their servants, I ask them if they could live on the amount they are paying to their servant (or whoever) , in this day and age

Cobblers on the streets who repair shoes, tailors who repair and stitch made to order clothes, dhobis, embroidery wallahs in commercial street of Bangalore,  gardeners, gold smiths, black smiths, shepherds, cooks who specialize in certain dishes, are a few of the ill-paid millions in India.

 My friend, an artist from a jeweller’s family was telling how traditional goldsmiths have gradually dwindled due to the onset of huge gold shops arriving in Bangalore offering huge discounts for jewels ; they can afford to sell gold jewels cheap as they buy gold from abroad, at low rates in bulk; the traditional goldsmith, on the other hand, can afford to buy only small amounts of gold when he needs and so ends up paying more for the raw gold. The children in these traditional families are not learning the family trade of gold smithing but going in for college education and professional jobs as the demand for their gold work is decreasing. Similarly, many traditional professions in Bangalore are disappearing. Low pay, little or no respect from people and no demand for their products as people’s tastes have changed….For example, girls prefer to wear jeans instead of a embroidered skirt and so demand for embroidery has reduced.

To get a feel of the Bangalore of the 60s and 70s, TODAY, maybe one has to go to the narrow gullies of Avenue road, Chickpet, Akkipet, Mamulpet, parts of Gandhi Bazar, Chamrajpet and Malleshwaram. There may be other parts of Bangalore such as Shivajinagar which have remained untouched to some extent at least, but I have not visited these areas recently. Another part of Bangalore which has not changed much even as recently as 2010 is the Gavipuram area. It is still rustic in it’s charm and existence.

Change in demographics is another major change in Bangalore. Before one would hear Kannada spoken on the streets and some Tamil, Urdu , English, etc depending where you are walking. However, Kannada seems to have disappeared in many parts of Bangalore now. I know this is hurtful to Kannadigas but I think we have to accept that Bangalore has changed demographically, with many outside state people living in Bangalore. Since I barely managed to pass in Kannada (though it is my mother tongue), since I loved reading English books, disliked reading Kannada books, I don’t have any problem with Kannada disappearing! But a part of me grieves that Kannada speaking people, the original natives of Bangalore are unable to hang on to their pieces of property and are selling it to the richer people from other states. Especially in wonderful areas such as Basavanagudi and Jayanagar.
In spite of changes happening all the time, some things do not change.The beauty of India is that as one writer put it, things from several centuries co-exist at the same point in time! For example, you have the modern cars going side by side with the bullock cart, which was probably invented many thousand years ago. The bullock cart, like many ancient inventions still in use in India, has not changed (except for the rubber tyres replacing the huge wooden wheels of the cart making life a bit easier for the bullocks!)
I recall seeing a lime grinding mortar and pestle (bullocks going round and round did the grinding) next to the Kaadu Malleshwara temple, at the bottom of the steps. Lime was used in building construction but is no longer used(I think…I am not sure). I wonder if the architecture and civil engineering students learn about the history of construction in India. In just a few decades, there have been such vast changes in the construction and design of buildings. One simple example I can think of, off hand, is the change from red-oxide floors to mosaic flooring and now to marble floors. Now in 2016, I heard that newly constructed houses now have wooden floors!
Change from teak to any available wood or man-made material for doors due to the disappearance of teak in forests is another transition. The unfortunate use of bathroom tiles in temples, inside the sanctum sanctorum is one unfortunate effect of modernization. The aesthetics in temples seem to be disappearing in today’s new temples or maybe I am more enamoured by the old temple designs and their simplicity.
There are so many changes which happened over time. And in different aspects of life in Bangalore. I have written so much and still have so much to go on! But maybe I will come back to these changes again.
Adieu.
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Rock salt was more prevalent than powdered salt in my childhood. Today I seem to see more of powdered salt around in most houses. Groundnut oil was preferred to palmolin oil. I still remember an oil shop in Rajajinagar…the only product sold was cooking oil; The seller would take several minutes to weigh the empty tin we had taken to buy the oil…he would place an assortment of aluminum objects to get the weight of the empty tin before pouring in the oil! I could never believe that an empty tin could weigh the equivalent of all the junk he placed on the scales!

Bangalore, during my childhood was less crowded, had less of cars and more cycles. I remember that on Sundays, the streets were silent except for the random autorickshaw which made a terrible noise, rudely waking people who were enjoying a siesta after the mid-day meal. I also remember that the streets were silent from morning 11 to evening 4 except for the push-cart and cyclist vendors or vendors with baskets on their heads, crying out their wares loudly, to attract the house-wives attention. I have written below all the vendors I can remember. You may have seen more vendors, selling more things but these are all my memories could recall.

I recall a guy pulling a cart on the streets selling salt (he was a tamilian guy in short shorts, probably khaki, with a towel tied round his head; the salt was in a open gunny bag with a measuring ‘se-ru’ in it’. This is a cart usually pulled by bullocks but as the salt is rather heavy, it would have been difficult to push it around on a cycle I think. Or maybe he owned a cart but did not own a cycle….who knows?

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Methi Chappati Recipe

Methi Chapati recipe
Ingredients

Wheat flour: 3 cups
Methi(Fenugreek leaves) greens: 1 bunch
Fresh ginger: about 50 grams
Tamarind: (size of a medium lemon) or Aamchur(Dry mango powder): one tablespoon
Salt: one table spoon
Green chilli: 4
Vegetable Oil: to roast the chappatis
Water:To mix the dough

Process:
Clean the Methi leaves i.e. take the leaves from the stems and rinse the leaves thoroughly and set aside.
Wash ginger, grate or cut into chunks and set aside.
Put the methi leaves, ginger,green chillis, salt and tamarid/aamchur into mixer and grind until coarsely ground.
Mix this mixture into the wheat dough and knead thoroughly.
The dough is ready to be made into chappatis.

These chapattis can be eaten hot or cold; alone or with curds, chutney powder, ghee, butter, Indian pickles or jam. I like it best with pickle; I  also enjoy it with  chutney powder mixed in curds.

Variations: The methi leaves can be fine-chopped with hands than put into mixer.
Red chilli powder can be used instead of green chilli. (Some complain of acidity using green chilli and prefer red chilli powder). Quantities of methi, ginger, tamarind can be varied depending on preferences.

The dough can be refrigerated and used over a week.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Why do Indian movie actors overact?


Why do Indian movie actors overact?

I ask myself this question hundreds of times and simply can’t find a good answer!
What is even more amazing is the fact that millions of Indians (and other countries citizens too!) appreciate the acting (and costumes, direction, story, script, etc) too and watch these movies, wasting precious time!

My list of reasons for overacting and acceptance by the audience:

I read in an article, that when India gained freedom from the British, there was a lot of poverty and starvation in India among the masses. The Indian movies, with story lines from Mythology, over-the top acting, dozens of songs and dances, provided these starving masses, an escape from their daily misery for three hours. And the tradition of providing fantasy and escaping into this fantasy by the people has continued to this day.

Another reason could be something as simple as, ‘Indian actors, i.e. 99% of them, lack the capacity to act, lack the training, the motivation to better their skills’. The few who do act well in my opinion include Nasseruddin Shan, Om Puri, Shabana Azmi,  late Smitha Patel (I did think Smitha overacted and seemed histrionic in a movie). The guys and gals who do lead roles over-act especially in the main stream cinema. Whether they overact by choice or simply lack the skills to act well, I cannot comment. But it drives me crazy to see the awards going to relatively mediocre or downright bad actors, year after year.

Another reason maybe that the Indian audience, seems to desire or value over-acting as good acting. Indians as I have observed, do not like anything to be subtle or understated. Everything in life has to be over-the-top for them to think of it as good or desirable. The clothes they like are colourful and bright/gaudy, not subtle ; our foods are spicy and rich, not lightly flavoured; we want to have an excess of everything good …be it food, clothes, wealth, whatever. In order to be accepted by the Indian audience, the movie-makers may ask the actors to ham it a bit I think. Before you start saying that I am against Indians, let me tell you I am 100% Indian and this has nothing to do with racism! We Indians are thin skinned, cannot stand criticism and make tall claims about our minimal abilities. 
If the Indian actor is subtle, I think the director thinks that the audience will not ‘get it’; hence maybe the actor is directed to shout instead of talk; the actress is asked to wail profusely instead of sob softly…I think the director thinks, that the audience will be moved only if the actress wails loudly, beating her chest and flapping her arms around; that the audience will remain unmoved if she does not demonstrate how sad she is! That reminds me of the differences in villagers and city folks in some respects. 
If you have visited villages, you may see the same filmy behaviours in the event of death or some dramatic event. I remember when my uncle died, the women, who hardly knew him, came to the room where the corpse was kept and wailed loudly for ages! However the grief was less demonstrated when my aunt in the city expired. The grief expressed was more dignified and restrained, even by those who were truly depressed by the death and even those from the village. But why do city folks (who are more sophisticated) also admire the not-at-all-subtle, over-acting of the Indian actors, is a mystery to me. 
In south India, at least in the Kannada movies, I have observed that many actors have never studied acting. They are in movies through sheer nepotism. Sons of actors, sons of politicians, sons of rich businessmen, become actors, with little or no training. How can one expect them to have any skills at all? Some actors are given lead roles, probably due to the arm-twisting tactics they adopt. As widely gossiped about, many actors are criminals themselves, or related to criminals and get into the movie-business through use of brute force and threats. However there is little or no mention of these facts in magazines and newspapers, perhaps due to fear of reprisals. The obsequious behaviour of journalists (and fans and almost all people who meet film stars) towards these film stars is enough to make anyone puke!

The directors and film producers know many Indians have cinema as the only or main form of entertainment and will see a movie, even if it is badly made. I don’t know about recent times, but when I was a kid, 30 years ago, there was not much other affordable entertainment for the poor, middle class, the rural and even the rich people in smaller towns and villages. Everyone could afford to see a movie however poor and would see movies, at least once a month or more. I know of several ‘movie addicts’ who would see all movies in which a favourite star of theirs had acted, would see the same movie over and over again, would want to see the movie, on the first day at the very first show, and so on. Most people I know were not over-critical and would be happy with a movie, however bad it was so long as it had a few songs, fights, romance and actresses in racy dresses. 99% of Indian movies have all these elements and as Indian audiences are not finicky but easily satisfied, the movie-makers get away with mediocre stuff. I would see a movie a month or two if I was lucky. There was no television of course and not many story books to read. So the only fun activities were the games we played on the roads till it became dark and the film songs on radio and the movie, once a month. I remember sitting for hours in front of my text books, recalling and fantasizing the latest movie I had seen, putting myself in the hero’s role, making changes to the story-line in my head ( I was braver and stronger !). These daydreams gave me endless hours of pleasure no doubt, but also lead to poor scores in my exams!
Now that I have access to better (I mean western i.e. American, British and a few Canadian and other countries) movies and television serials, books, the internet, other hobbies and interests and I find Indian movies a colossal waste of time. I have recently borrowed the DVDs of the movies of the 70s which I enjoyed but now I simply can’t sit through them! They seem so utterly slow and banal, I can’t imagine, how I enjoyed them so much, in those days. Is it that I had no access to better movies and so I enjoyed them? Or did I like them as my taste was the kind which enjoyed overacting and sub-standard movies when I was kid?

I know that quite a few actors are not paid at all or are grossly underpaid. I know of at least 6 people, who were ready to act for free in movies or television series. I know of two guys who were borderline mentally ill, so great was their desire to act in movies. They were ready to do anything to get into movies, were ready to act without payment if they got a role and wasted years and years of their lives, trying to get into movies. So, I do know that many directors and producers have these insane men and women begging them for roles and I am sure they are hired, simply as they are cheap or free. The directors I am sure are not too worried about their lack of skills, as these men come free.
This could be another reason for poor acting in Indian movies.

Another reason I can think as to why, we Indians liking this brand of overacting is that it may be having a cathartic effect on us. We get to see these exaggerated stories and acting and it feels good to weep and suffer the agony (albeit vicariously!) of the hero or heroine. I remember my grandmother who loved the melodrama and the extreme sufferings of the heroines and say how she suffered in the same way at the hands of her in-laws family, her enemies and so on. 

I also think that since we are so used to seeing this stuff, since childhood, we are sort of brain-washed into appreciating this type of over-the-top acting and exaggerated story-lines. But once again, what amazes me today is the fact that today’s generation have seen better movies, acting and TV serials from the west, with more realistic acting …yet they seem to enjoy and appreciate and value the Indian actor’s sub-standard acting. I am referring to intelligent, educated, cinema-literate people…by cinema literate I mean that they have seen good movies from the west. When I comment about the over-acting, these friends vehemently deny any over-acting and jump on me. How can they miss the exaggerated expressions on the actor’s faces, the slow and over-emphatic dialogue delivery, the repetitions (three times) of some actions and words…
I do not know how to argue with these blind fans. Some of the movies my friends have forced me to see as they are ‘good with great, superb, fantastic acting’ are Lagan, My name is Khan and others.
The situation is not going to get better unless the Indian movies improve or the fans become more discerning. Yet, the reality today seems to be that of Indian movies gaining popularity all over the world! I have friends from the Caribbean, from Egypt and other Gulf countries, from USA & Canada, who adore Indian movies! While I cringe with embarrassment about my country’s movies, these people tell me how much they enjoy Indian movies. The guy from Egypt told me how he sits in a theatre and watches 2-3 movies in one day! The friends from Caribbean know a lot more about Indian movie stars than I do! They do admit that the acting is over the top but don’t seem to mind it.

I still have not figured out the answers to this mystery…why do people appreciate Indian movies with their unreal stories, over the top acting and bizarre costumes.
Is it that the actor genuinely does not know he is overacting and thinks he is acting well?
Is it that the actor knows, but will not admit to others i.e. in public?
Is it that the fans have the type of taste which finds this type of acting “good”?
Is it that the fans are blind?
Is it that the fans know that the acting, etc is bad but will not admit, due to sheer ?stubbornness, pride, some kind of a misguided  patriotism or sense of loyalty?

Or am I crazy and the truth is that acting in Indian movies is actually good???

Maybe Sudhir Kakar, the famous psychoanalyst from India should be asked to give his analysis. I do know he has written a book about Indian movies or at least devoted some of his writing to Indian movies. But I wonder if anyone has the balls to write the truth about Indian movies and acting in India. When I read the newspaper articles about the review of new movies released, I see that, for the regional films at least like Kannada, Telugu, etc, no one dares to openly criticise the acting of the lead stars even if it is mediocre but write gushing odes to their acting abilities. As I mentioned before, Indians are thin-skinned and cannot tolerate criticism. I do not know if this applies to all of us or only a few. I do know that when someone published a book about Shivaji (The Maratha chieftan)in UK, there were violent protests in Bombay; when a journalist criticised a Kannada actor, he was attacked physically. Whether criticism of the film star makes the fans go berserk and violent or if the violence is part of a ‘campaign’ by the film stars or their associates or by politicians, one never knows. 

What I do know is that, in India, you need balls to criticise the rich and the famous
……if you have the balls and speak up, your balls get cut off…
….then you don’t have any balls left, so to speak…
….so in order to keep your balls intact, you don’t speak up …
…but if you don’t speak up, then it indicates you do not have the balls (even if, technically speaking, you do have them!)

Right now, in my 40s, I have reached a stage, where I have become so finicky that I find most Holly Wood movies too are  unreal, the acting crass and hardly one movie a year, is worth seeing. The stories seem pretty repetitive, predictable and the acting is not spontaneous, is quite repetitive. There seem to be very few (you can count them on the fingers of one hand) actors who are truly versatile. Most actors seem to do the same type of acting in all the movies or have the same personality types. Is it that, when one experiences something good like a movie, somehow the threshold changes and one wants the next one to be even better and then it reaches a stage when it is impossible to deliver what satisfies?



Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Conflict of Ethics

CLASH OF ETHICS

Brought up in the east and exposed to both the eastern and the western styles of behaviours and attitudes, I experience ethical conflicts about many issues. Here are a few of them.
Note: This was written over several days and I notice that I have wandered away from the topic and rambled about other issues too such as difference in ethics between countries and cultures, etc.

GIVING ALMS/MONEY TO BEGGARS:
In India, I was told by my grandmother to give money to beggars and if there were simply too many, to give to the old, the leprosy patients, the handicapped, the pregnant women, the little children and not necessarily give to the young, the able-bodied and strong appearing beggars. I was told that giving them will help me get ‘Punya’, get into heaven; I will get help when I need it if I help others now, etc. Also that these people are suffering from poverty and helping them will better their life. Ignoring them and moving on leaves many people with a sense of guilt.
Giving to beggars is also extolled in Hindu Dharma and also mentioned in books on Islamic faith, Buddhist and Jain faiths. Begging is not considered a crime or shameful but many famous saints, seers, sanyasis begged for a living. Many famous beggars include the God Shiva, Buddha, Saints and Seers, Philosophers, Devotees of God, etc. Many famous mythological kings begged for alms at some time in their life. Begging is therefore not strongly associated with negative images in India or in the east.
A few argue against giving to beggars, by giving reasons such as : these beggars are not really handicapped but pretending, they are thieves, they are lazy and refuse to work, they want easy money, that begging is actually an organized and profitable business, run by clever and evil men.
As far as I know, many people give to beggars than not give. This may explain why there are thousands of beggars in India.

In Toronto, Canada, there are few beggars. Many people do not give them money as they believe that the government is giving them enough; if given money, they will spend it on drugs; they ought to get a job and stop begging. The people who ignore pleas of the beggars on the road without a qualm are those who generously give money to organized charities.

I am constantly torn between giving or not giving. Many who ask for a buck look like they are on drugs and they appear so pathetic I want to give but also worry about their spending it on drugs and harming themselves. Depending on which side of the argument wins, I either give or not give that particular time .

Feeding free birds & animals in the cities:
We see in Toronto, several signs in parks which say do not feed the birds and animals. This is of course to stop interfering in their natural habits and see that they do not become dependent on humans and lose their natural food gathering/hunting instincts. But people, especially of Asian origin think of feeding as a kindness and not feeding as a sign of cruelty. In spite of explaining it is difficult to change their ways, especially the older folks.


Animals in the wild:
Do you all remember a debate going on internationally about the fate of a polar bear cub Knut, in 2007 in Germany? This cub had been abandoned by it’s mother and some people wanted Knut to be looked after by humans and saved while some insisted that it should be shot than cared for by humans as it was against animal rights? In India, it is unthinkable for any ‘decent’ person to even think of killing a baby bear for animal rights ! While in the west, there are people, who are equally ethical but think that the right choice is killing this bear !
These incidents indicate how highly valued compassion and kindness in the east (or at least India) while other values trump kindness and compassion in the west.


Hunting and Fishing:
I am a non-vegetarian eater and eat everything like all sorts of meat(pork, beef, mutton and chicken), eggs and fish. However I have this dislike and guilt about hunting and fishing especially for sport. I keep thinking of the pain the animals and fish feel, the intense fear when they are being chased by the hunter, the pain of being alive and wounded and running away. I also shed tears thinking about the mate or cub/s of the hunted animal waiting in vain for the hunted victim to return. I have still not understood how people, who are ‘decent’ otherwise, can hunt and fish and not put themselves in the shoes of these hunted animals and fish. I do not have a conflict of Ethics here …I am clear that it is unethical….but to me the wonder is that the hunters and fishermen do not feel conflicted about this issue.
You may wonder how come, I who eat non-veg food, use products made of animal parts can feel so guilty and upset about hunting and fishing. My excuse is that I am not hunting or fishing for sport i.e. killing or causing them to suffer pain or fear solely for my pleasure. Each Saturday I see this program on hunting and fishing on Canadian television and wonder how the people can go about hunting and fishing without qualms.
Commenting on a related topic, I am not happy about the animals in the west who are on farms which confine them in small spaces their entire life till they are killed for meat. I am referring to poultry and pigs kept in small spaces. There is no conflict of Ethics here…it is clearly unethical. Other similar issues which to me are clearly unethical are the use of animals for sports such as fights like cock-fights, dog-fights, etc. I am not sure to what extent the animals in circus and animals in shows are ill-treated but if they are ill-treated and kept in unhappy circumstances, it should be stopped. I think wild animals especially lions, tigers, etc who are in circus, prefer to be free and in the wild than in captivity in limited spaces, in noisy surroundings, etc. The same for nocturnal creatures who are made to endure lights in cages (owls), nocturnal creatures in zoos in day time, animals out of their natural environments like polar bears in the Tropical country-zoos, etc.





Respect :

In India, children are brought up to respect adults i.e. elders (parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, teachers, priests, etc). Often, adults who are pretty disgusting such as alcoholics who beat up their wives and kids, teachers who are extremely cruel and nasty relatives who behave atrociously are all ‘given respect’ and never once questioned about their atrocities. Even if they are questioned and taken to task by adults, the kids or anyone younger that the person are expected to show respect and never be confront these people about their abuse or unacceptable behaviours. The emphasis is on respecting ‘age’ of the person than any virtue in the person. I have often seen bitter, angry young children, silently wishing to escape their homes as they cannot take the shameful treatment by these adults whom they not only cannot confront but also have to ‘give respect’. It is so hugely conflicting for children growing in these cultures to confront the elders whom they are supposed to respect, unquestioningly. I have seen many of my friends who lived with extremely abusive elders and though they know that they were abused or still continue to be abused, feel extremely conflicted about confronting the abuser simply because he/she is older than them. They continue to tolerate, some do not even consciously acknowledge their distress and think that they love and respect these elders.
In the west however, I have seen young teens who boldly confront their abuser, irrespective of age and many of my friends who had been ill-treated by their parents as kids, refuse to have anything to do with these abusive parents now. I was shocked initially when I heard a Canadian lady call her dad a bastard and tell me how mean he was. In India, I have seen many daughters who have received such harsh treatment by their fathers but who will not call the father a bastard even in their dreams ! Even with intense and righteous anger, the children from these cultures cannot bear the thought of confronting their elders when they do wrong.



Blasphemy
I think I started writing this to talk of the clash of Ethics I have within me but now I am gradually veering off into Clash of Ethics between different people I think. With regard to Blasphemy, I personally do not experience any clash; I am okay with blasphemy. I am talking of this under conflict of Ethics as the value attributed to Blasphemy is so different in different cultures where the eastern and less modern and more rigid cultures give terrible punishments for Blasphemy while the western and more modern, less religious countries and cultures laugh it off or do not take it as seriously as those in the east. I am on the side of the west, more modern, who do not take B seriously.
In India, Pakistan and many eastern and mid-eastern countries, Blasphemy is a big issue and one sees articles in papers about incidents of Blasphemy or imagined Blasphemy by people and how they were punished by the mobs or religious zealots. There is no mention of Blasphemy in some countries such as Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia in the papers…do you know why? Not because it is not considered as serious but as it is considered ‘very’ serious and consequently the punishment is so severe, that there are almost no incidents of Blasphemy at all ! The more religious the country or the rulers in these countries, greater the severity of the punishment.
In my opinion, yelling abuse at God is done by people (1)mostly out of frustration or (2)to provoke people who are religious and as some claim,(3) it is not Blasphemy but it is Art.
Whatever the reason for Blasphemy, it is best to ignore the Blasphemy as the person is not hurting another person. And I do not think that God is thin-skinned enough to feel hurt if one of his own children yells at him or mocks him!
I have enjoyed the jokes about Gods in English movies and serials (British and American); I have enjoyed the art i.e. paintings, sculptures and books about Gods which can be considered as blasphemous by some. I have enjoyed the jokes too though some seem to be more distasteful than funny. The artist in me found some stuff distasteful but not enough to kill the creator!

It saddens me that the value system in the east is rigid, concrete, primitive and probably functioning at the lowest level of Kohlberg’s stages of morality. It saddens me to see how relatively sensible and intelligent people, get upset by the people who are blasphemous and want to punish them. The most famous recent examples of Blasphemy are of course the Danish cartoonist’s drawings of Mohamed and the nude art works of Hindu Gods and Goddesses by M.F.Hussain. But there are countless examples of Blasphemy in the eastern countries leading to death and destruction of property by hooligans ostensibly protesting the Blasphemy. The most recent and saddest I heard was a Pakistani Christian woman who is to be put to death for merely saying ( to people who were coercing her to convert to Islam) that Christ had given his life to save sinners and asking what has Mohamed done for the people.
What kind of Ethics is it to put a person to death for making a statement while rapists and murderers get away with heinous crimes in these countries? I could go on about this issue but I guess I have made my point. Also I feel so deeply saddened at the stupidity and cruelty of these people and wonder if God really exists and if he can sit idle watching the injustices going on.
I also get intensely irritated by people who deliberately provoke these already concrete thinking people through Blasphemy …In India, there are hooligans leaving Pigs or pork in Mosques and beef near temples just to cause fights between these two already volatile communities.
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How does one bridge the gap between the two types of cultures or two types of countries with such opposing values? When the value system and Code of Ethics is shared, it is easy to have a dialogue and come to some sort of agreement. But when the value system held and code of ethics is so opposite, I think it is simply impossible to bride the gap.
I am referring to the value systems held in countries where Religion dictates the government’s policies and Modern Democracies. Use of force to enforce a certain code of ethics or value system is not the answer. Force will not work but instead causes resentment and opposition. I am referring to the use of force (war) in countries like Afghanistan by the US forces. I do not for one moment believe that the Afghans will change their value system and start giving rights to women, etc just because the Americans say so. In fact, I think, they will become even more rigid in following their code of ethics in order to show that they will not be cowed down by force.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

SAP-NEERU/COW-PEA SOUP

COWPEA SOUP (SAP-NEERU)
Ingredients:
Cowpeas-half cup,
Green chilli -2-3
Salt-one table spoon
Tamarind-20grams
Onion-20grams
Fresh coriander leaves: 10grams
Water of course.(3-4cups)

Process:
1.Soak cowpeas in water for 6-8 hours.

2.Boil cow-peas in water and add salt so that it is absorbed into the cow-peas while it is cooking. Boil in a steam-cooker for about 20 minutes (The longer it is cooked, the softer it becomes). If you do not have a cooker, and boil it in a vessel, it will take a longer time to cook/become soft.
The water quantity for boiling the cow-peas is variable—you can use 4times the amount of cow-peas or more if you want the soup to be thinner.

3.Roast two or three green chilli
4.Mince about 20 grams onion into tiny pieces.
5.Wash and mince about 10 gm of fresh coriander leaves.
6.Soak in warm water and squeeze pulp from 20 grams of tamarind; or you could use tamarind paste.
7.Roughly mash the cooked cowpeas with a wooden masher or your hands.
8 Take some of the boiled cow-peas water in a vessel and mash the green chilli with your hands into this water. Pour the water back into the cow-pea mix through a sieve and throw out the seeds and flesh of the chilli.
Note: If you sieve out the seeds and flesh of the green chilli, no one will get hot chilli surprises while eating the soup. But there are some hardy souls who leave the chilli in the soup.
9 Add the minced onion, minced coriander leaves and tamarind and stir.
10. Ladle the cow-pea soup into bowls and serve warm.
It’s great on a cold winter’s day. Better than beer for some folks !

As you guys know, cow-pea can be substituted with a whole range of other stuff for soups and rasams. The quantity of ingredients I have given can be varied. Some add more chillis than I can handle and some add more tamarind. I find a lot of people who stick rigidly to the recipes especially quantities. But I think one can make lots of small changes to a dish, experiment and get good results.


I believe this is a south Indian dish from Karnataka. People in Karnataka call this sapneeru and dip ragi balls in this mixture and eat as lunch or dinner. Rice too is eaten with this but I prefer the taste of ragi balls with sap-neeru than rice. The cow-pea soup is too thin for rice, in my opinion. This is a simple, easy to make dish, with hardly any spices, tasty and nutritious. I don’t think it is fattening. This dish may feel rather simple for the sophisticated urban palate but what the heck ! My grandfather was a simple farmer from a village and I love this dish!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

MY DREAMS

MY DREAMS

Finding buried treasure---not broken pottery, even if it 5000 years old but solid gold and stuff !

Saving a rich person’s life…provided she/he repays me with overwhelming gratitude

Winning a huge sum at lottery—that I do not need to work

Winning a lottery so huge , I can solve the problems of all my relatives and friends (not necessarily in that order)

Watch movies, tv programs, dramas, dances, etc from all over the world….if the programs are good but not in English, then I would get them translated into English .

Read my favourite crime fiction, humour, etc

Travel…in the most comfortable style

Fight crime and corruption…..should I start in India where I am from or where the crime is the least (so it is easy to clean up fast and move on to the next place) or where it is the most or where I am currently living or where it is most tragic???

Fight religion’s evil effects on people…I wish I could abolish all religions except maybe Buddhism, Jainism and Zoroastrianism…..I have this belief that these religions do not damage the earth or people…but I may be wrong !

Ethically reduce the population of India by 90%...One way of doing it is to educate the people into not having kids and wait for the ones already born to die of old age…but that is soooo sloooooooooow . Another is to pack them off to other countries where there is a population shortage and their skills match the needs of the country but this too sounds impossible. Being ethical is like working with your hands tied and eyes blindfolded.

Once I had dreams of collecting various things like stamps, coins, gems, etc but now I don’t think of that anymore. I find that collections are dry and not really serving any purpose for me. (plus the bother of dusting them, jealously guarding them and the space they occupy in limited homes).

Other dreams are private and I am afraid of putting them here in case someone I know guess it is me !

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Chutney Pudi Recipe

Recipe for Chutney Pudi (Dry Chutney Powder..hot and spicy)

I had asked my mother to give me the chutney pudi recipe and she dictated it over the phone. I made it and it was a success.

After I ran out of it, I made some again but I had lost the recipe she had dictated and made it from memory. It was a success again.
But when I told my mom, the recipe I tried the second time, she said she had not given me that recipe ! That she would not have all those ingredients but used only a few of them.

I am putting up my version of her recipe i.e. My recipe.

Of course as you all know there are probably thousands of recipes of chutney pudi and each family has it’s own versions . That is the beauty of the cooking art. One can be experimental and creative and add or subtract ingredients and make so many versions of a dish.

OK. Here goes my version of Chutney Pudi

Ingredients:



For heat Dry red chilli -50(Indian chilli or Thai)
 For salty taste: Salt 40 grams or more if needed
For sour taste: Tamarind-50-100 grams
For sweetness: Jaggery-100 grams



Body of the chutney pudi:
Peanut-four cups
 Urud dahl-one cup
 Split yellow chick peas-one cup
 Roasted split chick peas-one cup

White sesame seeds- one cup
For flavour:
 Dry coconut-half or one
Curry leaves-about 50-100 grams
Garlic-one large whole


Process: Dry roast on low heat, until done the following i.e. chilli, peanuts, urd dhal, split channa dhal, seseme seeds, tamarind, garlic, curry leaves ( you will know it is done by change of color and odor)
the dry red chilli (this gets done fast; it makes the house smell, so do it with the kitchen door closed and windows open)
peanuts (do it one cup at a time if you are using a smaller vessal). No need to throw the skin …nutritionists claim there is some good stuff in the skin too
the split chick peas
the urud dahl
the roasted split chick peas
the dry coconut: either grate the coconut and then roast it for a brief time only or cut the dry coconut into pieces, roast it and then put in the mixer
garlic- remove skin, roast the pieces until soft (roasting till the moisture disappears takes too long and may not be necessary)
Tamarind-cut it into small squares after removing the fibre and seeds and then dry roast it till some moisture evaporates. This tends to stick to the pan and so do it at the end.
Curry leaves: roast them till completely dry. I do little at a time, so that the leaves are not sitting on top of each other while roasting and get done faster; if each leaf is on the surface of the pan, it dries quickly.



For garlic, tamarind and curry leaves, instead of roasting on stove in vessel, one can put them in the oven on low heat for a few minutes, until they are dehydrated but not burnt



Crush the jaggery into small bits before putting in mixer with other ingredients. if the jiggery pieces are too large, it will make a lot of noise when in mixer.

Now grind all the ingredients ( until you get a coarse consistency) in a mixer and pour into a large wok; add the powdered ingredients (salt and jaggery) and mix all the eleven ingredients in the wok. Fill it in bottles after mixing.

The ingredients can be ground in the mixer in two ways:
(1) Grind the ingredients one at a time in the mixer/grinder  ;  then mix all of the twelve crushed ingredients in a large wok.
(2) Put a little of each of the 12 ingredient in the mixer and run it; then empty the mixer jar and again, put a little of the 12 ingredients and run the mixer. continue this until all is done.  Stir the chutney powder in the wok until all the chutney powder is thoroughly mixed.

I find the second method better as the ingredients are mixed well with little effort;
Also grinding certain ingredients, one at a time is a problem as you can see below.
When the chilli alone is ground, it hurts to breathe;
the tamarind sticks to the mixer blades and it sounds like you are grinding stones ! Same problem with jiggery.
the dry coconut leaves oil sticking to the mixer;
the garlic is not fully ground but sticks below the blades of the mixer.


When you check for recipes you will see several varieties of chutney pudi. I love the dry coconut chutney pudi and the ginger –garlic-coconut pudi too.
This chutney pudi can be eaten with rice (hot rice and ghee with this chutney pudi is heavenly !) or with curds and rice. You can also eat this with roti or chappati or similar stuff. Sprinkling this pudi on any of savoury dishes too is fine. I have friends who sprinkled it on pasta, lasagne and bread .

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Value Systems in India

I have always wondered about the values system in India and praying for it to change.

There are so many unnatural values we adhere to, I am surprised that the people have not been more active in revolting against it.


There are many values in India I am against and I am sure a lot of people feel like me. You may ask, why I am doing nothing about it. I am doing nothing about it apart from talking and arguing with people. I find it simply too overwhelming to do anything more. I feel like a tiny ant trying to fight with the ocean……It seems impossible.


But I am at least going to write a little about it.


Once again, what I have written here is in no particular order but I am writing as things flash to me.


Suicide: Suicide is an act attempted by people who feel depressed, feel that there is no way out, feel hopeless and helpless. I believe like others, that one should not attempt suicide but instead seek help to resolve problems or seek help for depression. But instead, several movies glorify suicide and it is a resort chosen by several movie heroines ! I have also heard of a father telling his daughter, why she did not kill herself and that any self-respecting person who had failed in exams would have done it ! I have heard of people who scream at the family member who angers them to kill themselves as if suicide is a worthy option ! Suicide is valued as a respectable option to be adopted by a person in shameful circumstances….. a female who has been raped is supposed to opt for suicide. An abused wife who is thrown out of her husband’s house is supposed to die rather than seeking shelter at her father’s or getting a divorce or moving out.

Fortunately the situation is changing at least in the urban and educated classes. I have stopped seeing Indian movies but I hope it has changed there too.


Dowry: That giving and taking dowry is an offence and recognized as such by the government of India is well known. However like many many rules in India, it is only on paper. People who are unable to give dowry experience a sense of shame and the people who did not get dowry or ‘enough’ are affronted ! The value system is so perversely opposite of what it should be ! Once again, this perversity is glorified in Indian films…at least the movies I had seen about 6-8 years ago. You see the hero (Kannada movie) sweating his guts out to collect enough dowry demanded for his sister’s wedding and feeling bad if he fails to get the money ! What kind of a value system is the movie trying to propagate ?!?

I also hear people boasting that they were not offered any dowry but they still got married anyway…They are so proud of it……it is as if they have done a big favour to the girl by marrying her without dowry ! The wife of course is expected to feel grateful for his kind benevolence !


Obedience to parents: Indian parents with kids who toe the line are so smug and complancent about this unnatural level of obedience, I want to slap them hard! The parents proudly state that their son/daughter will not cross a line if they ask…and they are not talking of kids below ten years but of adults. A child, even if an adult is not allowed to have a mind of his own or her own but seek parents guidance, permission and approval for all decisions. An independent child is a disobedient child and therefore not a loving or good child ! Parents seeking to control their adult children quote ‘model’ children from Indian mythology and try to guilt their kids into complying.

the parents who fail in their attempts to interfere in their adult children’s decisions, change their tune and boast about how they are so ‘broad-minded’ and ‘modern’ that they let their children make decisions themselves ! The decisions can be major decisions like what course to do in college, person to marry, employment or even minor decisions such as hairstyles or clothes !

Unless the value system with regard to autonomy and independence for children comes about, we are going to have a nation full of spineless kids, forever dependent on their parents.


There is a lot more I wish to write. I will write again when the mood strikes me again. Ta Ta.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

A few of the ten thousand reasons I am glad to be out of India

The reasons are not listed in any order but in the order they flash across my mind :

No more facing the ‘eve-teasing’ i.e. the dirty behaviours of males towards females in public places like buses, foot paths, etc.

No more standing in queues and watching with frustration while people simply join in ahead of you

No more facing rude behaviours of people especially in government offices…where you have to beg humbly to get your work done (it’s their job…they are not doing you any favour but act like they are). Pay a bribe to get it done. And the worst for me was that I have to be respectful even when I am paying the bribe…the slightest bit of anger or sneering on my part and the bribe gets refused or pocketed but the work is not done ! One has to pander to the inflated yet frail egos of the government clerks without uttering a word of protest against their slowness, errors, refusal to work, inefficiency, corruption or anything .

Religious and classical music: I am not a fan of music and I especially cannot stand classical (Carnatic) music and religious songs. Living in Bangalore, I was forced to listen to loud religious songs on every religious occasion, coming from the television or radio at my home or from the loud speakers in far off temples. And what I hated most was listening to the same set of songs every year, several times a day (on that religious day…like the Gajamukane Ganapathiye… on Ganesh Chaturti). I can stand carnatic music if it was live but to listen to the high pitched voices of women on cassettes was brutal ! I so enjoy the blissful silence at my home now and to listen to music of my choice and when I want it
The daily transactions or interactions with people which really wore out my good nature (or what little of good nature I have !) in Bangalore was the interactions with the bus conductors, auto drivers, the guy in the government ration shop and so on. The most disgusting was the looks and comments of the oglers on the streets.

What else ? The beggars really did not bother me as they did some of my friends. I in fact feel sorry for them, even the young able bodied ones….When many many educated people I know, could not get jobs in Bangalore, how can one expect these poor people to get jobs, given their lack of education and skills. Begging seems a lesser evil than thieving.

There were a whole lot of irritations I faced in Bangalore which seem to have gotten worse now(2010) such as the frequent and long power failures, the shortage of water, the frequent breakdown of telephones (landlines), the inflation which is just eating up my dad’s pension and causing a decline in his quality of life, day by day.

My dad and so many people who did not leave India rant at me about my lack of patriotism and intense dislike and criticism of India. But my question is what is patriotism ? Should I like India as a geographical entity or should I like Indians or Indian culture? As one Britisher said, I like India but cant stand Indians ! That I cant stand Indians is an exaggeration of course, but there are so many habits and behaviours of my fellow country men which intensely angers and irritates me.

When I hear from my folks in India to return and help out “India” or “Do something for India” I want them to see my perspective. For example, I hear of a flood in Bangalore and that the govt is collecting funds to help. I would like to send money of course, but I always have the suspicion that the money sent from here will not reach the true victims but is stolen by the government officials in charge. The magnitude of corruption puts one completely off India or helping India.
Now I would like to say something about why I disliked schooling in India( I was in school from 1971 till 1980). I do know that schools have improved a lot since my time but I am sure there are still a lot of ugly features in Indian schools even now.

I was a typical average kid, not too bright and not retarded ( I hope !). Being an average kid in some schools like the National English School (Now it is National Public School I think…the one with Gopal Krishna as Founder/Principal)is a nightmare ! Every child, irrespective of ability level is expected to do well and punished quite severely if not doing well. The punishments were so physically and emotionally brutal that I am sure most kids self-esteem was permanently damaged. I do not want to go into the details as I am sure most Indians will know.

Another thing which made me miserable all through my school life was the difficulties I had studying Hindi and Kannada ! It was torture especially the “Old Kannada or Hale Kannada”. I learnt Hindi so well later when I saw Hindi movies and serials but the way Hindi was taught in school was so uninspiring. Plus the Hindi teacher was the most brutal in her punishment and I remember praying for her to be absent every class. Sometimes I think my emotions in school (as also that of millions of other Indian school kids) is like that children in Dickens novels….pure terror.

Now that I read a lot about child psychology, I cant imagine how life must be for special needs kids in India like the ones with ADHD, DD, Dyslexia, Epilepsy, etc. While working as a counsellor in Bangalore, I saw many cases of kids with these problems whose problems were not recognized and they were beaten by teachers and parents. I still remember telling a teacher that the boy is not lazy but has a learning disability and the teacher curtly told me that “middle class parents like to call their lazy or dumb kids dyslexic” ! I wanted to smack her but had to shut up and gently request her again to help the boy.

The long line to use the toilets in school, the long lines at the taps if you did not bring water, the boring and tedious exercises in Physical education classes, the boring moral education classes (we had to learn so many Psalms by heart that it was torture…My friend copied them in test which defeats the very purpose of moral education, isn’t it ?)

I have been cribbing for so long that I am sure you readers are getting put off. So I am going to recall and write of things I liked in India. There are tons of those too.
Mangoes (both the sweet variety and the Totapuri), jackfruit, sapotas, the Seetapala especially the milkshakes of Apple, Seethapala and sapota at Ganesha fruit juice centre at Basavanagudi. I like other fruits too but these are especially dear as I cant find them now, where I live.
The Masala dosas in hotels and also the set dosas. The wonderful capsicul bonda near Arya Samaj at VV Puram, Bangalore filled with shredded raw onion, carrot, coriander leaves and sprinkled with chilli powder and salt with a drop of lemon juice squeezed on top. The ‘bele obbattu’ made at home by my mom , ragi mudde with bas saaru, or kalian huli, ragi roti with kadlekai chutney, etc. Each aunt of mine was known for a dish and I loved all those dishes.

Roaming in M.G.Road or Brigade road after buying the tickets for an English movie was another favourite. Seeing an English movie was another favourite pastime of mine though it was a long process with several steps. Waiting for a good movie to come to Bangalore, convincing father that it is not vulgar, that is probably educational, that seeing the movie will not negatively affect my studies, wheedling the money to see the movie, finding a dress in the bare wardrobe, befitting the occasion, leaving the house well in advance of the movie (as very few buses ply from Rajajinagar where I lived to Shivajinagar, where the English movie was.
People watching in the M.G Road and Brigade area was a lot of fun too. I loved seeing the fashionable clothes the people here wore and I always wondered why I did not see them on the buses leading to M.G.Road or Brigade road. Did they all have cars or arrive by autos? I don’t know.

Hmm. What else did I love in India or Bangalore where I spent my entire life? Roaming the streets for books which I have already mentioned in an earlier blog in detail.

I loved shopping for clothes (rather I would buy dress materials and get them stitched) and have spent several happy hours in Commercial street, picking materials with friends or my husband. After which we ate at one of the eateries off commercial street or at Bhagatram’s in commercial street itself. I also hugely enjoyed going to the many many handicraft exhibition and buying the handloom materials, bedsheets, etc. ( I loved the smell of those handloom clothes !) I must admit my husband started getting fed up of the handicraft exhibitions and I had to literally drag him to them after a few years !

Going to the tailor with the dress materials , giving measurements and getting them when they were ready was not fun for me. I disliked it but I had to do it.

One mild pleasure or rather a relaxing peaceful time I had was when I visited some temples in the afternoon of a working day when the temples were mostly empty. These temples included the Lalbagh Anjeniah temple, the Basavanagudi temple for Basava/Nandi, the Kadumalleshwara temple in Malleshwaram. These temples are really peaceful in the absence of crowds and the chimes of the bells (only in the Malleshwaram temple) or the rustle of the Peepal tree leaves in the wind was very comforting.
I have always found uncrowded temples such as those in villages or remote places and simple temples ( by simple I mean with just a deity and a bell and not much additions like tube lights, etc) more conducive to contemplation of God than the jazzy ones. Sadly, the more people like a certain temple, the more the contributions and more the decorations and crowds and then the temple is no longer attractive to me for praying.

In Canada my social life is next to nil, as I have not made many friends after moving here. However I had a great deal of friends and relatives and had a wonderful social life in India. True, I found some of my relatives very intrusive, there were severe disagreements, tears, fights, hurt feelings and what not but there was never any boredom ! I think social life is something I heartily miss.

Another major thing I miss is the humor I enjoyed with my friends and colleagues and relatives. Canadians are great people and I love being here but the kind of humor and repartee I enjoyed in India is impossible here. The Canadians I interact with are polite and I think 90% of the jokes I made/enjoyed in India would be unacceptable here ! The humor I enjoyed in India was really funny but politically incorrect, crude, hurtful to several people (the jokes were about one’s caste or a disability one had and so on). Let me assure you that both the people I interacted with and myself are relatively decent people and harbour no ill will towards any group. But we did make jokes attacking people. For example, the Gowdas in my group poked fun at the two Brahmins in our group who in turn attacked the Gowdas in their talk. Then it would be women attacking the men and the parties would realign as men vs women. At least a few of my colleagues in India were very witty and it was sheer joy to see the verbal attacks and defenses when they got together. Needless to say, the relationships were so good that there was no possibility of misunderstandings or hurt feelings or egos, however sharp the comment.
I did try joking a bit in Canada but I got such shocked looks that I decided to shut up until I understood what sort of humor tickles the Canadians. It is not that the Canadians lack humor. They have created some really funny and enjoyable movies and tv series (e.g. Newsroom , Trailer Park Boys) but I am unable to have the same fun chatting with them as I did in India. I can relate to the Indians who have moved here but their kids born and brought up in Canada are a different set altogether.

My husband misses the Baale-yele oota (food served on banana leaf), the Basavanagudi area and his friends.

We definitely definitely definitely don’t miss the Indian movies and television at all. God ! I hated them when I was in India itself !
The same story in a million movies, the same type of music, the same stereotyped acting, the same poor jokes, Ugh ! To escape being subjected to the Kannada/hindi/ whatever tv serials is one major blessing for me. I know that the current youngsters in India have access to some American and British movies and serials on cable and a lot more on the internet but I could see only a few English serials when in India. I feel really miserable when I think of the countless kids in Indian villages exposed to the poor fare offered by Indian movies and television and that they don’t know something better exists . The city kids have a lot of options.

What else do I miss and don’t miss from India? I don’t miss the dirty or absent toilets for women travellers in India. I miss the ‘Yelneer’ or tender water of coconut which we would drink when the bus stops while travelling. To me, yelneer is manna from heaven compared to the coco cola and other soft drinks we get in Canada

The pleasures of poverty

My childhood days were like any of those Bangaloreans living middleclass lives or lesser in the seventies. We did not have what we do today: telephone, gas stove, fridge, television, furniture such as a dining set, car, ‘own’ house and so many other things we own now. Today, my house is overflowing with books and clothes and electronic and electrical gadgets, and so many other things while the house of my childhood was almost bare.

That Spartan life however had countless happy hours which I remember to this day; I think I am missing that happiness now, because of the overeasy and abundant availability of things . The pleasure one finds in small acquisitions is great when one has very few things around. I still remember I had a small wooden box and I had filled it with chalk pieces, ‘balapa’ i.e. another type of a chalk piece, bits of candle, a matchbox and some broken and some intact marbles I had found on the road. I think I also had a stash of safety pins and hairpins. This collection was precious to me and I often opened the box to look and enjoy my store of things. I also remember feeling immensely proud and happy when the electricity failed and my grandmother asked me to give my store of small candles. Todays kids have tons of toys, games, books, electronic toys and what not. But I doubt that anyone of them experience the pride and joy I did when I gave those candles to my grandma !

I remember picking several objects on the road and bringing them home as I thought it would be useful to me or my family at some time. Usually the items were nails, bits of metal, hairpins and I cant remember what else. Even these items were a source of great pleasure to me ( Was hoarding, a habit I developed early?)

I seem to remember having more happy times when I had less of worldly possessions ; I have gradually become richer and I did buy things I had wanted. However there has been no proportionate increase in the happiness or excitement when I acquire these things. I have also noticed that when I had less things, the more I used them.

There was a time when there were a mere handful of books at home. I spent so many happy hours reading them over and over, and each time of reading/rereading was a pleasure.
I would get storybooks for each birthday and I would read the books over and over again till my next birthday ! (There weren’t any public or private circulating libraries near my house then;). There were a few favourites which I have read so often that the books practically fell apart.
Now I have tons of books at home and there are so many of them, I have not read at all and several half read and discarded books. The same goes for clothes, dvds, vessels in the kitchen, vases, footwear, ornaments, etc. The more I could afford and the more I got things, the less I used them. I think I now have stuff, lying unopened for months after purchase ! Now the excitement seems to be more in the hunt for the object than in using it. The excitement seems to disappear once I have acquired it and there is only a little pleasure when using it.

The same applies for movies and television. (There was no television in Bangalore in the 70s and my house did not have a television till the mid 80s). I was taken to one film a month as a child and I remember running the movie in my head with various changes ( I am the heroine !) daily and getting a kick out of it. ( This type of daydreaming is the cause of my poor academic performance). I have spent countless hours in these fantastic daydreams. When my dad bought our first television, I did not miss any program, however boring it was ! If you remember, there was only one government run channel initially and the programs were beamed only for a few hours every evening.

Subsequently, movies were shown every week on television and I obsessively tried to see all but of them. However, I could no longer remember them all and even started getting the story lines mixed up ! Now I have become so picky, that very few movies hold my attention or interest. I wonder if I would have been different that is enjoyed the movies, however mediocre, if I had been deprived?

I am happy to say, I still derive a great deal of pleasure out of television serials even today ! This maybe because I deprive myself of cable ! I don’t have cable ( after getting into a major argument with my cable provider) and get about 6 channels daily. I really enjoy seeing the serials available on these channels and I watch them in spite of the blurred and double images ! I have also bought a few dvds of some shows and watch them a few times over months. I pray to God that I don’t ever lose the ability to enjoy them.

I think the word I was looking for while writing all the above paragraphs was “jaded”. Now people are jaded with the surfeit of things they have while in the past, due to scarcity, they could appreciate and enjoy the few things they had.
I can remember all the toys I had as a kid though I am in my 40s now. But my nieces cannot remember the toys they bought last year I think ! They have so much and therefore play less with each toy and do not care to remember them.

There is a lot to be said for poverty or deprivation. I definitely got more pleasure out of each book/movie/toy/thing when I had very few of them or had very limited access.
Now, however, trying to find things which interest me seems to take more effort than in actually participating/enjoying the activity. For example, when I go to borrow a dvd movie, I scan several and can rarely find any movie which interests me enough to borrow. I go to a library and browse through many and often come out with nothing.
I am wondering what could make me so indifferent to things I enjoyed so much in the past. Am I jaded? Am I depressed? Am I getting old and is it true that the older you get, the less you enjoy ? Am I becoming picky and so it is only a narrow range of things which I enjoy instead of the entire spectrum of books or movies or whatever? Is it a change only I experience or a lot of others do? Am I becoming tired or lazy? It’s difficult for me to pinpoint what reason is affecting me. It may be a combination of them or only one of them.
But again when I am in a place with limited access to things I love, I again, completely use up what little I have and enjoy it ! Like when I go to India and cant lay my hands on books to read, I read whatever I can lay my hands on ! But in my home here, I have tons of books which I like but not got round to reading ! Is a state of deprivation mandatory for me to enjoy ? Does owning things make me feel comfortable/complacent about owning and make me postpone actually using or enjoying the item? The same goes for the dvds I have, clothes, accessories. Food too. When I have one sweet or snack item at home I relish it but when I have stocked up, I just don’t feel like eating anything ! (maybe I am lying about food. I think I do eat something as food is something which I am never tired of !)

I had very few clothes (Wednesday was the day we wore coloured clothes instead of the uniform to school) in my early days and I remember all the clothes I had then and how much I loved those few clothes and the joy I got wearing them. Now, either because we (my family) are better off than before or because Indian society itself has changed, there seems to be an abundance of all things . Yet I do not see a proportionate increase in satisfaction with this abundance. Children today have more clothes than I ever had and yet them seem to want more and are critical of what they have. The same goes for the variety of games, toys, foods available for kids today. I can imagine adults feeling jaded but children jaded?? And bored with what they have and always wanting something bigger or better or more exciting ? I think unless, kids (and all of us) experience some deprivation, they will be headed towards a life of constant boredom and constantly seeking something “more” thrilling or exciting or whatever.

And this makes me think of another idea. Is it that today’s children’s attention span or interest span is getting shorter? I mean that , children or yester years would be happy with one game or toy for many months before losing interest in it but today’s kids, explore a toy for a few days and then their interest fades and they want something new to stimulate their interest. I am not saying all kids are like this or all toys hold all kids interest for a short span of time. I don’t think the constant craving for something new and exciting is so bad. But I am concerned that these days, objects hold one’s interest for such a short period of time and one wants a new item, even before fully trying out the item in hand.
I wonder to what extent this problem is fostered by the fact that rich and indulgent parents frequently buy toys for their kids . If you buy a new toy everyday, why should a child play with a toy you bought last month?

Below is an account of what I went through to reach this stage of ennui and short interest span ….my experiences of financial insecurity followed by security and the pattern of enjoyment during the financially insecure period followed by a sort of ennui during financial security.
As I have told elsewhere in this blog, I emigrated from India to Canada and we had to start from scratch. We had to find jobs, live on less so as to not run out of money before we find a job, manage on what we got in our 6 suitcases until we got jobs. Though we were tense and focussed on getting a job, we did have the time to enjoy lots of things. We had a blast reading books from the libraries, buying used books from the Goodwill stores, watching shows on a black and white tv (someone had thrown out a black and white tv set on the kerb and we got it home), taking long walks and exploring the city, chatting with our families on yahoo chat, watching people ( and their clothes, hairstyles, jewels and accessories, ), etc.
Over time, we got jobs and started buying the things we could only enjoy through shop windows. And slowly the pleasure and joy started decreasing and the same sense of ennui set in. Now I feel the pleasure seems to be more in the chase to acquire something and once the object is got, it is used briefly and lies forgotten in some corner of my home.
One of the chase related rushes I get is when I am bidding for something on ebay. Fortunately I have cured myself of this ebay bidding habit and saved myself a lot of time and money ! ( Or rather, my office cured me of it…I was bidding at work and now the ebay site is blocked at my office computer)

Sometimes I think, I would like to start again, from nothing, as the excitement of the struggle lets me experience a plethora of emotions: I could do with the sense of achievement, the pride, the thrills but I could definitely do without the fears and tensions one has while struggling. The boy who repaired his cycle without any help from the father enjoys the sense of achievement which the boy who was helped by his father cannot.

Enjoying life beats the jaded feeling and ennui which some of us have. If it takes financial insecurity or job insecurity or “not being” rich, to appreciate and enjoy and experience things, then so be it. Many parents ( my relatives and friends and so many good people out there) want to provide their kids with ‘everything” and especially those things they wanted when they were kids but dint have. Parents also want their kids to ‘enjoy’ and ‘not suffer’ or ‘struggle’. I think they need to rethink about the benefits of ‘letting their kids struggle to achieve. They need to rethink the benefits of providing ‘everything’ to their kids. I see this a lot in parents who have had major transitions in their lives…those who moved from villages to the city, from India to other countries, from a lesser socio-economic status to higher. Maybe all parents have this need to provide everything for their kids, I don’t know.

I don’t have kids so it is easy for me to comment and criticize parents ! But I do understand the joys they feel when they buy their kid something ( I am now becoming convinced that parents get a greater kick out of buying their kids things than the kids get in playing with them !) .
I really appreciate the super rich parents who have to exercise discipline when bringing up their kids ! Imagine Bill Gates kids demanding sweets or toys or rides daily . He can afford it and he may want to give it to them to show his love but he has to ‘not’ give in to their excess demands if he wants them to develop good discipline or whatever….. Infact, I think it is easier for a economically ill off parent than for a rich one to bring up kids with discipline ! The ill off one does not need to be disciplined to not buy his kid…there is no struggle as there is no money ! But the rich parent, has a huge struggle on his hands ! He can easily buy but should not . Boy ! I hate that kind of a struggle as I have no discipline at all !

I keep telling my sister, that adversity or deprivation can be a blessing than otherwise as it gives her a chance to struggle and this struggle gives her so many things which wealth (by wealth, I mean, whatever is the opposite of adversity and deprivation) cannot give…the joy of achievement, the struggle which keeps her on her feet and saves her from boredom, the pride of doing it on her own without help. More importantly, the knocks from a struggle harden her and she is better prepared for any new knocks life has for her in future. The failures during a struggle, the taxing of one’s mind and body, all go towards building up the resilience and strength of the person. To be ‘lucky’ and hence to be deprived of struggle is like the body being deprived of essential exercise :one may become weak without facing adversity.
Wealth or comfort or support (support from family for one) really can be an obstacle in itself in that one misses out on valuable experiences of learning, growing, acquiring maturity, and misses on the emotions which follow a struggle: relief, happiness, thrill, anger, sadness. Remember, even emotions like sadness or anger or sense of failure can have positive consequences and not experiencing them can be a loss.
Children growing in families where they lack nothing and children from families where there is some deprivation are equipped differently to face life. I am not saying that one is better than the other. But I think I really liked my “to some extent deprived” childhood.


This which follows is vaguely related to the stuff I wrote above. I am throwing it in anyway for what it’s worth…….Another odd quirk I have noticed in me---I enjoy some songs (Like Kid Rock’s sweet home Alabama and Duffy’s Mercy). But I lose interest completely if I own the cd. I however get a great deal of joy if I hear it by chance on the radio or someone else’s system. Is it that the moment I own some things, I no longer care for it? Go figure.