Father of Kurt Wallander of the Henning Mankell series ...painting the same thing over and over...was it his escape from his world?

 This is another anti-Trump, anti-Musk rant of mine.

My go-to place when I want to escape the ugly realities of the world is into day-dreaming or fantasy. Years ago, I had at least 3-4 fantasies and I would go into one of them. These days, it is a single fantasy, which I go to, for escape. Sometimes, I make minor tweaks in the fantasy and at other times, simply go through the same fantasy (or plot or story or idea...you can call it anything) in my head. The changes or tweaks are usually to incorporate something I saw or read or myself created.

After indulging in this fantasy for a while (few to several minutes) I am ready to go back to the real world and do whatever needs to be done...work, meetings, chores, whatever needs doing.

Today, I suddenly recalled the father of  Kurt Wallander ( a fictional detective from Sweden... one of my favorite series) who, painted sunsets over and over again, in every book that he appears. The paintings were the same ...sunsets with grouse or sunsets without grouse. Years ago, when I read the books, I thought, this old man is untalented or crazy...who will paint the same thing over and over...

When I observe myself these days,  fantasizing the same plot over and over, I realize that I am exactly like that old man who painted the same thing again and again.  The fantasy, which I am stuck on,  is very calming.To fantasize new plots, I have to "work hard to create". This involved effort and I think I can put in the effort only if I am inspired by an idea and  I am also having the mood and energy to create.   

I am going through the same old fantasy, over and over again, to calm down.  Going through the same old plot serves to reduce my anger, frustration, boredom, sadness...whatever negative emotion I am experiencing. 

Wallander's dad painting the same thing over and over...I no longer think he was crazy or untalented. I think, we need, we all need, something to get away from unpleasant reality and then return, calmer and replenished to deal with the draining realities of the world.