S my cat: 15 years and 20 days old at time of death

S, my cat: born August 22, 2010- died September 10, 2025, 6.15am 

My darling cat, my beloved baby died 2 days ago in my arms, struggling as we tried to put painkilling drops in her mouth.

I loved him so much, I miss him so much, every room in my house reminds me of him.

I can't believe 15 years has passed!

If I could have him a bit longer

If he did not suffer that dental pain in the end

If he had only died peacefully in his sleep...

I am grateful for so many happy days he had in his life and happy that awful things did not happen to him (like my neighbour's dog which was hit by a car in front of my house...like my husband's collegue's cat which ran away..like my friend's cat which had been diagnosed with ptsd...)

I am grateful it enjoyed playing ball with me

I am grateful it enjoyed watching videos for cats on my computer

I am grateful it enjoyed eating the cream which I took from top of the milk, (milk which I heated to make coffee) put on a saucer and gave to him every morning and evening...ever since I discovered he liked it

I am grateful it enjoyed the walks in the backgarden with me

I am grateful it enjoyed chasing the squirrels in the backyard

I am grateful it enjoyed sunning itself on the grass or the rocks at the back

I am grateful it enjoyed eating the grass

I am grateful it enjoyed scratching the scratch pad

I am grateful it enjoyed the catnip in the scratchpad

I am grateful it enjoyed chase I gave it when it wanted to play 

I am grateful it enjoyed the running up the stairs

I am grateful it enjoyed the massage, ear rubs and head massage it got from me and my husband almost daily

I am grateful it enjoyed the company of visitors to my home

I am grateful it enjoyed the petting from cat loving friends who visited

I am grateful it enjoyed jumping into the bed with us in winter

I am grateful it enjoyed getting under the sheet in winter (It would paw me..i had to wake and lift the sheet and let it in , under...after a few minutes, it would exit from under the sheet..too hot for it? it was quite furry as it was a ragdoll)

I am grateful it enjoyed chewing on things at times..

I am grateful it enjoyed licking my breakfast cereal bowl after I finished, several mornings. (I stopped eating cereal as it was supposedly high in sugar. Sammy really missed it when I switched to a different breakfast! It would ? smell the cereal and come to me, whereever it was but did not come when I ate something else)

I am grateful it enjoyed keeping an eye on our backgarden and I dont think it enjoyed this but it was certainly fired up when it chased my neighbour's cat out of 'his' backyard!

I am grateful it enjoyed jumping on the bench in the mudroom and basking in the sun  mornings and evenings, looking at the birds, squirrels, racoons, butterflies in the back. I am grateful it enjoyed sitting in the bedroom and looking out the window...sitting in the bathroom and looking out the window at the buses and cars going by...sitting in the den and looking out the window.

I am grateful it would (rare) jump on the kitchen counter and explore!...jump on the dining table and explore...I am glad that my husband and I gave complete freedom to our cat and it was fearlessly exploring the entire home...no restrictions from us...some visitors wanted us to have 'boundaries' but neither of us wanted to restrict our cat in anyway...

I am grateful it enjoyed sitting on my chest and kneading

I am grateful it enjoyed sitting on my husband's chest and doing the same

I am grateful that, every first night (the first night is when we return from being away from home and S had been alone at home during the time we were away,,, our neighbour had a key and he would come in daily to feed S, clean it's litter, and spend a few minutes with S) S spends the WHOLE night in my bed, sitting on my chest for HOURS, kneading!  Next night onwards, he returns to sleeping by himself, downstairs on his chair, as he usually does, in summer (Winters, he sleeps in our bed)

I am grateful it enjoyed exploring the basement and hunting for mice

I am grateful it enjoyed chewing on a type of transparent colorful ball I got in Dollarama (it chewed it to bits!)

I am grateful it was such a communicative cat! It would mew...asking me to open to door to the mud room...if I did not open, it would look at me and the door alternately!...If I still did not open, it would jump on the door and seem like it was trying to open it! Then I would open.

It would jump on my bed in the morning and I would massage it....if it wanted the cream, it would walk away from the massage and sit looking at me... I would then go down, make coffee, get the cream and it would have the cream! I adore the fact that it could talk to me without saying a word!

I am grateful it enjoyed 

><><>><><

I am sad it did not like getting it's nails/claws clipped every month ...but she was a wonderful lady, who did it so quickly and efficiently and painlessly!(20 nails in as many seconds!)

I am sad it escaped from me, ran into my neighbour's neighbour's, neighbour's backyard...on a rainy morning and I could find it only after 7 hours and by then it was so stressed out that it did not even come to me! It had been hungry for 7 hours, lost and god knows, how scared it was in that rain, in someone 's garden and not knowing how to get back home! But it was fine in about 3-4 hours after I searched and got it back

I am said that once, it chased my neighbour's cat and got into a fight with it...I am wondering if it got hurt? I did for sure when I separated them! I had to take antibiotics as my hand swelled where I got bitten by my cat as I was separating them.

I am said it hurt it's shoulder last year ..but the vet assured that it was a sprain and it recovered fast.

I am truly said it developed dental pain, suffered a bit at the end and died in fear....I truly regret this but dont know what else we could have done... If it was possible for me to take it's pain and my cat be pain-free, I would do that in a heartbeat.

Looking at what I have recalled and written,  I am so glad that my cat had more happy days than sad.

><><><

Some qs in my mind:

Did it miss us when we were away on vacations? Ws it anxious? Lonely? Did it worry we had abandoned it? Or was it okay, with my lovely neighbours who came daily in our absence to feed, play and clean the litter?

Was it stressed out when I had left it at my friend's place (both my neighbours who took care of it died in the last 5 years, due to COVID) when we went on vacation? My friend and her family are cat lovers and took great care of it...petted it and took tons of photos and probably did more for it than me.

Trump: The president who is legitimizing large scale theft! Bravo: Now America has are white collar, upper-class Republican thieving rats, thieving and lording it over the honest hard-working, tax-paying middle and poor class

When I think of Trump...I thank the Gods for the gift of mortality he/she gave to human beings!

Adulting for middle-class, urban youth ( in Bangalore)

 Adulting for middle-class, urban youth ( in Bangalore)

Even since I discovered the word "adulting" , and read articles on adulting, I have been impressed that someone finally recognized what is going on, coined a word for this. Not only has Adulting been recognized, acknowledged and named, there are also classes on adulting! (in a couple of universities in Ontario, as far as I know)

What follows below, is about the need for adulting for middle class youth of Bangalore (I know about 50 youth here: relatives and kids of friends and neighbours).

There is a HUGE need for adulting classes or adulting for Bangalore middle class youth(BMCY from now)

Parents I know, seem to believe that their children have to succeed in life and that life would be IMPOSSIBLE if they failed

The definition of success for most BMCY's parents seems to be : become a professional such as a doctor, software engineer or dentist. Earn well. Go abroad for higher studies and settle in USA, Australia, Canada.. Get married and have kids, a house, car, etc

This is such a narrow definition of success .(It you study arts, and become an artist or work in retail; if you study social work and become a social worker, etc you are considered as "less successful" or maybe even a 'failure' in comparison of the youth who tread the narrow path to what is recognized as success. 

If you don't go abroad, you are less successful; if you are gay or prefer to remain a bachelor, you are a failure; if you cannot afford to own a house and you rent, you are a failure. You are a less successful youth if you study nursing or any paramedical science or get a Diploma in engineering instead of a Bachelor's degree in engineering)

This is how the mind set works for majority of BMCY parents. Therefore to make their kids succeed, the kids are forced to spend all their school-years,  studying and given no time to learn life skills, to play, spend time on hobbies and interests, etc. They definitely do not do household chores,  or do minimally. (Girls, have a little better self-reliance as they probably strive to escape patriarchal domination by learning skills necessary to become independent)

My friends' sons: I have 3 friends with sons, who have finished their education and are married and working now. None of these boys have ever (or rarely) done their own laundry, cooked, paid bills, swept or vacuumed their own rooms. None of them have contributed financially to the household once they got jobs and continued to live with their parents. (Incidentally, all three are living iwth their wives in their parents homes with their parents...I don't object to this as the joint family arrangement is working for these three guys..to most extent)Servants or mothers did these jobs...now their wives or servants do these chores. 

Due to various reasons, several skills such as fixing a bike which is broken, a household implement which is broken, is a mystery to majority of people in India. Fixing broken doors, windows, a leaky roof, etc are also skills which most people lack; It's not just a lack of skills: it is lack of affordable and available tools and most importantly, a lack of curiosity and interest in knowing how things work, why things breakdown, etc. I am simply appalled by the lack of curiosity I see in majority of Indian children. 

After the Modi government came into power, I have seen such a huge regression in critical thinking in India. Huge increase in religiosity, belief in superstition and scientific thinking and rationale kicked to the curb. This regressive mindset too has affected youth. Examples: Instead of studying effectively   (studying from the beginning of the course, clarifying what they dont understand, practicing, doing actual experiments to learn instead of rote memorizing), students seem to pray, offer money, etc to Gods and temples to pass in exams...they don't study but they pray!

People's lack of critical thinking is rampant and visible in all aspects of life, across all strata of society: even "educated" Indians lack critical thinking. Several aspects of 'adulting or learning critical life skills is impossible without critical thinking". 

Regarding the interpersonal life skills which BMCY need, but lack:

Communication: Communication skills are  not great in many families due to the interpersonal warfare going on in many houses and so poor role models  for BMCY (Most people don't seek help professional to fix their relationships) The patriarchy in many homes makes for terrible communication styles and interpersonal relationships between those who wield power in the family and the powerless. The controlling behaviours, rudeness, refusal to acknowledge when they are in the wrong, by the power holders leads to the same sick pattern of relationships and communication among the BMCY.

Social skills: BMCY are exposed to  role models with poor social skills. Housewives who are disrespectful to the servants; men rude, condescending, contemptuous,  & disrespectful to their wives, subservient behaviours by wives to husbands and in-laws while resenting them in private, and many such sick behaviours are witnessed by BMCY  all through their childhoods and teen years. How are they going to learn better social skills? They are also exposed to Indian movies and TV shows which depict atrocious behaviours. (because the producers think that decency is boring and atrocious behaviours is the only way to gain more viewers).

There is also the belief among the upper middle class that "we can hire people todo things. There is no need for me to learn" . This terrible attitude is one of the main causes of ignorance among rich BMCY and their families.

I have seen BMCY, with masters degrees in medicine, engineering, arts, etc who lack  basic life skills. They would fall on the developmentally delayed list, if they were administered a adaptive functions scale!

Another pet peeve of mine about BMCY is the narrowness of their interests and knowledge. There is neither breadth nor depth to their knowledge, whether it is bookish knowledge or practical skills.

I know of at least 5 BMCY who don't read novels, who don't know anything about the politics of the country or the world, who have zero practical skills and have always had a parent, servant or others do stuff for them. These 5 rankle me (they are nice youth actually!) a lot because, when I asked them, when they were in their twenties, what is their favorite book, and they said "Tinkle" ! (it's a comic for young children). If they is where their level of literature appreciation is at, God save India!

I am also aware of a few (thank God, not many) parents who are proud of their children's ignorance! ("My daughter does not know how to cook. Her husband cooks for her"; " "I never learned driving, we have always had a driver"; I dont know anything about taxes, My husband does all that")

How can you ever become an adult, in the true sense of the word, if you are proud of your ignorance of basic life skills?

Other major contributors to lack of adult life skills in BMCY are because:

Indian education system is failing youth of India

Parents are failing the youth of India. 

Indian government, the state governments are failing the youth of India

The mass media (movies and TV shows) are failing the youth of India.

The Order: Movie on amazon prime

 I am watching this movie , THE ORDER now and reminded again how exceedingly beautiful the USA's geography is!

And I am also realizing this beauty is being destroyed by Trump...he's  throwing away the protections the wild parts of USA had.... selling forest land to developers...Trump is the kind of guy who will prostitute his daughters, his grandkids, wife and mother for cash. He has zero morals, 100% impunity and is proud when he is pissing on anything good. Hope he rots in hell for eternity

Rosetta McClain Gardens, near Scarborough Bluffs visit

Yesterday, Sunday, July 6, 2025 visited the Rosetta Gardens in Toronto. It's a lovely garden, today, I mean this time of the year, the rose garden was in full bloom with at least 5 varieties of roses. 

This is a quiet garden, with few visitors (at least yesterday) and there are several benches all over the garden, where one can sit and relax. One can see the vast Ontario lake from above (this garden is above the bluffs). It's worth a visit. 

But not if you are going by TTC! I took over 2 hours to reach this garden due to the poor TTC service yesterday...every weekend the TTC service is horrible. I had to take shuttle bus as the subway was not working and then wait for several minutes to get onto the bus which goes to the garden

 

Above are photos of a building where the garden seems to have grown inside and where somme walls have disappeared. I loved this spot!

I went alone to this garden...wish I had had someone to take a photo of me sitting between the 4 huge ? trunks ? branches of this tree. 

Above is a large gazebo ...I could sit here daily and read my books and not miss my phone at all

The roses from the rose garden above

The Brokenwood mysteries : TV show from New Zealand : one of the nicest shows I have watched. (It's on Tubi.com in Canada, a free channel)

 I love the characters. Especially Mike Shepard, the detective inspector.

American shows need characters like him.

The funniest of the Brokenwood mysteries is the episode "Dog Day Morning from the 7th season"

If you have time to watch only one episode, you should watch this.

the connection between Trump's tongue and Trump's brain, (or what is supposedly a brain) is broken

 Therefore, Trump talking is like a wheel, which has come off a moving vehicle and rolling down the hill, willy-nilly. 

Trump's stupidity and evil was garnering attention, anger, despair; ...but as it continues endlessly, it's making people feel both bored and hopeless at the same time. 

Waiting for Trump to finally be imprisoned, impeached or #$%^*+

Talk about rabies

 Q: What do you do with a rabid  dog ?

A: Terminate it. Kill it. Euthanize it.

Q: What do you do with a rabid president?

A: Oh! You mean Trump?

Q: Yes

A: Gee...we negotiate I suppose

Q: Does it work?

A: Not really.

Q: Then what's the point?

A: I dont really know

Q: So, what you are saying is, if the US has a rabid president, he simply continues being the president?

A: I suppose...gee...I dont kow how to answer that!

comedy one needs today to get away from/ avoid/recover from/from Trump's evil

 

 comedy skits

Rudy Ayub

Guido Gagootz

Elaine Carroll 

I will add to this list as I discover them.

The world needs more of these guys (and ladies) above and less of Trump, Vance, Putin, etc

I have been watching Very Mary Kate (Elaine Carroll's comedy) for the last two hours. They are so funny! I love Mary Kate, her bodyguard and her poor professor! Hope she continues to make these skits forever!